This is a look at life that encompasses metaphysical aspects, nature and the cultural adventure of an English woman, Sara Gardner, from London living in the Finnish forest whilst setting up a holistic healing place to live and work.
Tuesday 26th June 2007
My neighbour's mowers is also refusing to work so in a random act of kindness I spent a couple of hours yesterday clearing her grass. I had been inspired by the term random acts of kindness a few years ago and was reminded of it on Sunday when I stopped off at a beauty spot to stretch my legs on the way to Tampere. There was a lot of litter so I grabbed a bag from the car and spent some time clearing it up. It looked better when I left and I felt good for having taken some time to do it rather than just tutting at it. I do try and do that these days, see what I can do to change something that bothers me rather than just muttering about 'them/they/those people' who do these things. The shift in the energy it brings into me is amazing. I also keep aware of not slipping too far the other way into a total ego place of 'aren't I so good for doing that' because the energy flowing through me with that statement isn't so nice either!
Monday 25th June 2007
My lawnmower hit a tree root and bits flew off so I thought I would do the responsible thing and take it to the garage for a service but I was told that it was too expensive for repair! This came as a bit of a shock as I only bought it 2 years ago for a hefty sum of money but apparently if you mow a tree root it can imbed and bend the central thingy as opposed to when you hit a stone and it just bounces off. I can't believe I dumped the rotten old mowers I had here thinking it would be better for me to have a newer more reliable one, doh! So whilst I am thinking about what to do I have purchased a hand pushed lawn mower just like we had when I was a little girl growing up in London. It's taken me back down memory lane everytime I use it and I have used it a lot as there is something deeply satisfying about making the garden look good without spewing out fumes as I go. I had wondered previously if it would not be more environmentally friendly to use a hand mower but the size of the task was daunting, however, these days I tend to leave many parts of the garden as nature intended because it gives the birds, frogs, toads and assorted other creatures somewhere to rummage or hide and I do like to have a garden that is welcoming for wildlife. I've been really impressed with the amount of nests I have around here this year. I noticed the other day that a fieldfare has nested in a birch tree on the edge of the lake, I think she may have built the nest during some of my quiet days as she is so edgy when I'm outside so I wonder why she built there. Bless her, I'm trying to give her some space. As I look out of the window I can see her chasing some poor unsuspecting blackbird that dared to hop around within 50 metres of her tree. She'll need therapy if she carries on like this!
Special holiday discounts now apply to anyone who can dismantle a lawnmower, hammer straight the central thingy and then reassemble a working mower! Please apply to the usual address...
Monday 18th June 2007
I had a massage today from a friend I do regular healing swaps with but today something different happened. My back had been stiff again in the morning after improving for so many days and I was aware that I was feeling a bit down about that. I know that if I think about the fact that only 3 weeks ago I couldn't stand up and now I'm walking, dancing and even jumping occasionally so I have come a long way but when I was younger (blimey that makes me sound old!) I recovered from these back attacks with days although knowing what I know now I suspect that instead of addressing what my body was trying to tell me I most likely just forced my way past all the feelings and stormed off through life again. So now I am trying to allow the pain and the stiffness to just be there without blocking it out (I am a master at blocking pain and now the effects of that are coming home to roost!) because I know from some bio-energetic work I've been studying recently that the tensions I hold in my back, chronic tension, are holdings from withheld feelings throughout the duration of my life. The way for me to release this tension is to allow it to be there so that it can come further towards the surface until eventually it can be expressed. Have you ever watched a child stiffen their back in defiance so that they won't respond to you? Well, this happens with many emotions, sometimes anger which is disapproved of gets held in there, sometimes we hold back tears because we don't want people to know they have hurt us, sometimes we hold in our enthusiasm because we fear exposing the things we love in case they are used as ammunition against us (Dr Phil in America is a great one for this). The holding of these emotions in our muscles eventually becomes such a habit that we don't realise we are doing it until 30 years later when things start to break down. There has been an increase in the afflictions caused by muscle tension, we call it fibromyalgia or ME or chronic pain syndrome. It doesn't really matter what you call it, the important thing is what you are going to do about it once you realise it's there. Having just read a description of the symptoms on the Internet I can now tell you that I have fibromyalgia!! From my studies and from my own truth I can tell you that what I have is a history of severe holding patterns of pain (pain in all forms, physical, emotional, mental and spiritual) mostly drawn from my rigid defensive characteristics. That is the good news because from this place I can use all the techniques that I know (with the knowledge that I can and will find others to assist me too) to increase my awareness of these blocks, to allow them to be there without fighting them, to express them in whatever manner is appropriate and to then infuse myself with loving energy to heal the area and embody the new way of being. I call my system F.A.T.E. Find/Face the problem, Acceptance of the issue, Transformation of the energy blockage and Embodiment of the teachings I learn from this process. It works with everything! It's what I use with my healing practice here. Anyway, I seem to have wandered a thousand miles from where I began on my couch having a massage for my poor old back which seems to have taken on so much of my suppressed emotions. The massage as usual relaxed everything but this time I was aware of a growing feeling inside of me, very faint at first so I just let it come louder and louder until I could recognise it. Eventually I realised that I was feeling sad in a strange kind of way because somebody was showing me love, somebody was caring for me, somebody was taking the time to work with all the little muscles to allow my body to relax and it was choking me inside. I realised that for the first time in who knows how long I was allowing myself to surrender and to be loved. It wasn't that I had never been shown love before but I had never been in a position to allow myself to trust that love and to let it in...there was the key difference. Very slowly with my work at the school and at home I have began to learn to trust to open my heart and let love in, I've always been very good at letting love out (wouldn't be much of a healer if I didn't!) but even that in some ways was used as a defence against ever having to trust again to let it in. So I let myself be loved and cared for, stroked and held and then when the feeling overwhelmed me I let myself sob and grizzle all of those held emotions out. I could feel so many deeper tensions melting away, at one point a huge lump of stuff just jumped out of my body which made my back jump into the air and crash back onto the couch and it all felt so beautiful, which made me sob even more, which released even more. When I was finally able to look my friend in the eyes to see the love being held there I sobbed again and in that moment I knew I had finally made it back over the hill.
So to anyone out there suffering with any kind of chronic tension syndrome I would invite you to step out on a journey inside yourself to find what lurks there and what is being held there that you have forgotten about. Meditation will give you the 'muscles' to 'look' inside, to grow your awareness of your inner self, to see/hear/feel/know what you are really feeling. Any kind of movement therapy, dance, yoga, chi kung, tai chi, will help start the flow of energy round the body just as they assist the circulation of blood too, and as the energy starts to flow it very slowly can start to chip away at those blocks just as the flow of water does to a sand bank, little by little and sometimes in a great avalanche. If you need help with the emotions that come too, because as sure as eggs is eggs if they scared you enough to bury them the first time they will scare you this time then seek out the assistance of a healer that you trust and feel safe with. I would most definitely recommend anyone from the School of Energy Healing...or of course if you fancy a holiday I do also know of a great little place in Finland...... But most of all be thankful for the day you found out that you are in control of what is happening to your body which means that you can do something to start making it how you want it to be. Yay!
Saturday 16th June 2007
Last night's new moon passed with the usual amounts of stuffing my face because I had forgotten to take note of the lunar cycles. Never mind, the ice cream, blueberry pies and Chinese food were all very nice!! My cupping equipment arrived yesterday so I spent last night with various sized rubber jars attached to differing parts of my anatomy. Now, now not those ones!! I've been aware of a very sore point along one of the meridians on my lower leg for some years now and nothing I do seems to shift it so I thought I'd give these cups a try as they are designed to be used for acupressure which is similar to acupuncture but without the needles. My leg did feel a lot more open afterwards and I felt quite queasy during the night which is a good sign of detox happening....however it is also a sign of eating too much ice cream etc!!
On my walk this morning I heard the unmistakable sound of baby woodpeckers in their nest and so I was able to locate the tree that housed the Great Spotted chicks. In the same way as last year they have used an old birch tree with a large fungus growing out of it to provide a porch roof for their doorway. After taking the dogs home I collected my camera and returned for a photo session of said home. Interestingly enough on the way back past the compost heap I found a green woodpecker presumably feeding on the insects therein. Meanwhile Mr & Mrs great Spotted woodpecker were suitably annoyed and very vocal at my appearance at the base of their formerly secret residence but I settled down in the undergrowth (with a good smattering of insect repellent on my exposed bits!) and waited for them to calm down and continue to feed, which they did very shortly. I was quite pleased to note that the vocals they emitted upon the arrival of a buzzard half a mile above our heads were an order of magnitude greater than those that had greeted me so clearly I wasn't really considered much of a threat...more of a weirdo probably (and I'm quite used to that impression!).
Tuesday 12th June 2007
The hot sunny weather seems to have passed for now so it was nice to head out walking with the dogs for the first time in quite a while. I've been taking them up and down the road to collect the post just to keep my back moving but today we set off on a 4 mile walk. I went up onto the recently cleared hillside. Remember the christmas tree that I was relieved had been spared? well it has now been taken down and the really sad thing is that it is stacked up with no ownership labels on it yet, maybe because it is such a great size that nobody wants it. I have collected various pieces of it that were left lying around and I shall make some ornaments from them. I counted the rings on the stump so now I know that my great friend was 104 years old.
Thanks to John for letting me know that the butterfly is a swallowtail. I think it is the Common Yellow Swallowtail also known as the Old World Swallowtail (papilio machaon).
Friday 8th June 2007
I had another quick massage treatment today but I was already feeling much better...in fact mum is slightly suspicious of how much better I am now that she has done all the planting!! Whilst clearing out my handbag yesterday I made an interesting discovery, wrapped up in a piece of paper was an old jigsaw blade which I had taken with me to the shops to ensure I bought the right type. I'd done that about 6 weeks ago and since then I have been through 2 airport security controls with it still in my hand luggage!! So much for all the security about sharp objects etc. all you have to do is wrap it in a piece of A4 paper and it becomes invisible. And to think they made me stand there unaided whilst they checked my walking stick and then made me lean up against a wall whilst they body checked me...albeit very gently!
I spent the afternoon between the sauna and the lake. The water is around 21 degrees and is so nice to just float around under the clouds with the sun on my face and Mrs Duck with her 6 ducklings swimming around me. The garden had been visited by a beautiful butterfly today which I finally managed to get a picture of. As usual I have no idea what it is so if anyone knows then please tell me. The picture shows it on the lilac flowers with the Brimstone butterfly so you can get an idea of the size of it.
Thursday 7th June 2007
I spent another night camped out but wasn't quite so comfortable this time probably due to the fact that I wasn't so exhausted. Although the weather is very hot just now it isn't always like this as there can be late frosts so we don't tend to plant out stuff until this time of year unless we want to be keeping a strict eye on the weather and being prepared to cover everything. The weeds in my vegetable patch have been doing very well in the past few weeks what with the rain and then the intense sunshine so I needed to clear them before thinking of planting my potatoes and seeds. My back isn't the most useful thing to throw into the equation but I made the best of a bad situation and just sat on the ground and worked through the weeds bit by bit. Luckily my two angels in the shape of my mum and my daughter also helped me...in fact my mum should be nominated for sainthood for all the work she has done for me in the past few days on top of all the usual things she does whilst I'm away. Thank you very much mum (I know she'll be reading this some day!). I did a healing swap with my friend yesterday afternoon and it really has made a difference to my mobility. I got a great massage around the base of my back incorporating something called cupping which involves some plastic suckers which make a vacuum next to the skin. The cups can either be left there or moved around to loosen up the skin and the layers just beneath it. In my case at the base of my spine the feeling was so good, it was the best relief from tension I had felt in over a week. Cupping is quite a traditional therapy here in Finland and I'm sold on it now. In fact I'm going to order my own 'cups' because the relief of muscular tension was so marked. By the end of my massage and treatment I felt very dizzy and sick which is always a sure sign that blockages have been moved or started to move as all the toxins start to move and enter the system. Now is a good time to drink lots of fresh water, rest and maybe take an enema if it doesn't settle.
Wednesday 6th June 2007
I camped out in the garden with my daughter last night. I don't think it was so exciting for her as I was exhausted after getting home at 2am so I just fell asleep! I had the tent front open to take in all the night time nature sounds and fresh air. It doesn't really get dark here at night and the birds never really stop singing at this time of year either so you get to hear many different voices. I wish I knew what they all were especially the one that sounds like a chimpanzee! Laying down on Mother Earth made my back feel great (another surprise) but it was as difficult to stand up this morning as per usual and sitting here to write this is very painful....so I'll go now!
Monday 4th June 2007
So there I am at Stansted with my case and my growing hand luggage (can't resist a bit of shopping!) trying to get onto the bus from the long stay car park. I couldn't pick up my case at first so I shifted position with the walking stick to give me better balance to pick it up but I couldn't help noticing that instead of offering to help me the holiday makers behind me tutted because I was taking too long to get on the bus! Now I really have seen and heard everything. I'm so very grateful that I am aware of how we can choose our own realities and I'm so very happy with the one I have chosen for myself. Spending a week in various amounts of pain and disability has really shown me a lot about the world and the folk therein, experiences for which I am very grateful but the thing I'm most thankful for was the pain! Yes, that's right, the pain! Because I found out that it is much easier to surrender to life and the well being flow of the universe from a place of pain. I finally stopped kidding myself that I knew better, I finally gave up with trying the same old same old again and in the middle of my pain I could just give up and hand it all over to a higher nature. Result: one very happy and contented me, I still have pain and stiffness but I also have something much deeper and peaceful, something that nobody can take away from me. It's the same shining light that we all have inside of ourselves, we can choose to ignore it or we may forget about it buried under all our rubbish but it will still be there shining away through the cracks. Remember that next time you think you might crack, smile and think about how that will let the light shine through!!
Sunday 3rd June 2007
I had a wonderful moment during our whole school meditation/intention alignment healing this morning. I felt that I really wanted to open up my heart but when my healer touched it I could feel the familiar metal doors and glass barriers all slide back into place. Letting love into your heart when it has been battered previously can be a very scary thought but I was determined to do it this time because I am so aware of just how painful and isolated a closed heart is too. One person I would trust with my heart would be Christ and so I asked him to help me....bless him he did. He took my hand and I opened my heart to the loving healing energy being poured into me and I sobbed...and it felt really good. I have gotten so much out of this past week away and have changed...not dramatically but more subtly shifted towards the truer version of who I really am.
Saturday 2nd June 2007
This was graduation day for the year above me. A beautiful day that ended with me dancing. In the morning I had taken the floor briefly to announce to myself, my friends (witnessing is an important part of healing as we are no longer hiding parts of ourselves in shame) and to the universe that I forgave myself for all the harm I have ever inflicted on myself either through pills or blades or words or thoughts or situations I had placed myself in.
Friday 1st June 2007
Today was my big release day. My back was getting more loose during the week but that had increased the pain I was in, however I thought that pain was an improvement on paralysis so I wasn't complaining! We were studying the rigid character structure and as per usual it sounded like a personal description! We were practicing the healer techniques and I was pretending to be a rigid client (no pretending needed there!) when I went into a great physical release which I believe is known as an orgasm reflex. Yes, it does exactly what it says on the box and boy did it release so much of the stuck tension from my hips, pelvis, coccyx etc. At lunchtime I had a healing releasing another entity that was gripping my rectum (that could explain years of constipation!) and then some beautiful psychic surgery. That afternoon I lay down my stick and walked unaided and haven't looked back since. Not saying that my back isn't stiff or that I don't still have pain and a lot more work to do yet but when people saw me that day compared to how I looked on Tuesday it was like a miracle.....only it's not a miracle it's energy healing doing what it says on the box!
Thursday 31st May 2007
Today I released my imaginary friend Chrissie who had kept me company when I was young and didn't care if I spilt ice cream down my front, or ate too much or looked a bit fat, she loved me just the way I was and I was quite sad to say goodbye to her but I knew that I wanted to be myself just for myself from now on. My little Sara (inner child) was a bit sad too so I took her for ice cream. Funnily enough when we went into dinner we had ice cream for dessert.
Wednesday 30th May 2007
Very briefly, entities are pockets of consciousness which we have invited into ourselves at some traumatic point in our lives to help us but then we forget about them and don't know the effect they are having on us. As we grow older and no longer require their help we find we are distorted in how we act but we don't seem able to change it. Today we were doing entity releasing healings and I discovered what all these balls in my stomach were! I had an entity which was moving round my abdomen poking me and teasing me and being very mean and nasty. This confused me for a while as I couldn't see how that would ever have been helpful to me but I trusted the healing and continued to sink deeper into it until I came across the familiar story of my old playground bullies who had regularly pretended to be my friends and then tormented me. Then I understood why I had invited in this energy. It kept whispering in my ear how everyone was lying to me, how they all hated me really, how they all think I'm boring etc. and by doing that it stopped me from connecting with people and thereby it stopped me from the pain and humiliation of being manipulated by these playground bullies. Once I had that understanding I could thank the entity for it's help, let it know that I was ok now to deal with bullies myself and to be myself regardless of others opinions and that it could now leave in peace and return to the light. Once you reach that place of understanding, gratitude and love then the energy just goes because nobody is fighting with it, there is no judgment about it and therefore no attachment to it. Very beautiful and no more lumps in my stomach!! Yay! Funnily enough right after that one left another one came up and immediately started to tell me that nobody would like me anyway but I told it that I was happy for people to not like me if that was their truth but the important thing was that I liked me and that was the only thing that really mattered. This announcement made that energy transform too.
Tuesday 29th May 2007
The drive to Brecon wasn't great but the company was and it felt good to be heading for a healing place. I arrived and sorted out a room on the 1st floor to save me some effort, decided that the lift was worse than the stairs as the lift doors were too heavy for me to move without lots of pain and collapsing legs. However, I found that my buoyant mood didn't last long and for some reason I felt really stupid to have traveled all that way and I really wanted to be at home. The strain was beginning to get to me. We did a healing in the afternoon and it left me feeling so distant from everyone...that's a huge understatement, I hated everyone and thought the whole healing thing was rubbish and I wanted to just go home. I couldn't go to my room as the previous occupants hadn't moved out, I felt really bad so I headed for the only space I could claim as my own, my car! I drove to a nearby layby, reclined the seat and chilled out reading and snoozing in my sleeping bag. I could watch the goldfinches playing in the pine tree above me and all the other birds and nature around me which eventually brought me back to peace. I felt so much more connected with nature than with people. This wasn't a revelation to me! story of my life really. I eventually went back after a few hours and sneaked up to my room....well as much as you can when hobbling slowly with a stick. I knew I was processing but I didn't know the way out of it so I just let it all come over me and go on with reading my book. The lady who had been staying at the cottage the previous week had recommended me to read the part about relationships in 'conversation with God book 1' so I did and lo and behold the answer to my troubles come flying out of those pages and slapped me between the eyes. There I was thinking how awful everyone was, how they were mean to me or not treating me nice, they couldn't be trusted, they were all liars etc. and this book turned it round and gave it squarely back to me. What was it in me that I thought so little of myself that I couldn't ever accept that anyone was thinking kind thoughts about me. Finally it made sense to me how I was feeling and I was at peace. I didn't have the answer, as my lack of self esteem has been an ongoing journey for me for a while now but it was good to see how I was causing the trauma I was suffering. It's much easier for me to change how I feel about myself than to try and convince the rest of the world to tell me every 2 minutes how much they like me just to keep me happy!!
Monday 28th May 2007
Last night an old back injury flared up and now I'm totally incapacitated! it's always obvious before I go off for my next school week that the particular aspects we will be studying start to come into my awareness, sometimes very forcefully as they are an integral part of me and how I interact with the world around me......or more precisely, how I create the world I live in! So, as I couldn't walk I thought 'this must be my entity and my rigid structure coming to the fore'. I knew the best thing would be to get myself to the school, get some healing, sort through my stuff and clear the root cause of years of back trouble...maybe not all in one week but a start at least. Thus began my adventure! I didn't get dressed until 6pm, got someone else to pack my bag and headed out to the car. Luckily my grandfathers old walking stick was here because I couldn't have walked without it. I had to pick up my legs to get them into the car but once cushioned into the car I could hang onto the steering wheel and drive. It took me 20 minutes to walk from my car with my wheeled case to the terminal building only 200m away and I was totally exhausted when I reached it. The whole experience was opening up my eyes to many fascinating facets of humans. Struggling across the car park I was apparently completely invisible to everyone else, one car driver snapped at my heels as I was obviously walking too slowly for his liking across the crossing and the people who took advantage to push in front of me at the check in desk because it took me so long to move were steadfast in their forward gaze! The staff were lovely though, they carried my bag and helped me through security with the minimal hassle....I couldn't actually stand with my arms outstretched so we had to compromise with me leaning against a wall. Due to my severely limited movement skills I had to wait till last and for the plane to be refueled before getting onboard but I did get a whole row of seats saved for me right at the front of the plane so I could lie down for the whole flight...that probably saved my life!! To add to the mix I had also developed stomach trouble, it felt like I had a bowling ball lodged in my actual stomach and several tennis balls in other various locations of my abdomen. Anyway via a string of helpful staff and other people I did eventually make it to my friend's place in London around 3am. Very sore but glad to have the first leg of the journey done with.
Friday 25th May 2007
I swam in the lake!!!!!!!!! The swifts are back here already screeching in the sky and performing their aerial acrobatics! Both unusual happenings for May.
Thursday 24th May 2007
I took my camera with me this morning to get some shots of the morning sun in the new birch leaves and the green tips of the christmas trees and as is typical in these situations the camera took one shot, told me the battery was low and shut itself up! And then true to form a buzzard circled overhead just in the perfect position for a great shot, oh well! I sat out in the middle of the lake last night (in a boat I should add!) as it was one of those beautiful calm nights with everything perfectly reflected on the water and down at the other end of the lake the mist was rolling across the water and the christmas trees on the horizon were perfectly silhouetted against the lemony rose of the fading sun. The swallows were still chasing each other above me, the cuckoo gave an occasional call as did many other birds I didn't recognise. As I watched the clouds in the water it was easy to drift further down as it seemed as if the clouds were in a place miles below me. I found it very relaxing and very opening as it took my senses to a really new place which felt very real after a short time. I'm very conscious at the moment how belief systems we have create our own reality and I know that it is a double edged sword. We can create the things we want but we are also creating the things we don't want because of core beliefs that we picked up in childhood that have become so ingrained in us that we don't even know that we hold them anymore and yet they are shaping our lives. It's a big part of the healing work I do here that shows these beliefs to my guests because awareness is the first step towards changing them or transforming them as I prefer to think of it. Think of something radical and just imagine for ten minutes how your life would be different if it was part of your reality.
Wednesday 23rd May 2007
Natures death theme seems to be continuing in my consciousness after the bird yesterday. Death is a natural part of life of course, natural progression to another place and another form of the same cosmic energy. Last night was the second warm night and the greenery has now taken over and I note the mosquitos are alive and well in the damp pine forest. The first thing I noted whilst out this morning was an abundance of slugs...not my favourite creatures and one of the few things on this planet that I won't touch, they give me the right eebee geebees! I didn't realise that they could be carnivorous either but I saw one of those huge ones with the black marks on the back feeding on the squidged remains of another. I can't help thinking that they can't make very good hunters, I mean what would they catch? An arthritic mollusc who's been under the weather for some time. Talking of catching things, my f****** dogs found and caught a baby hare again, I screamed at them and they did let it go but it didn't make it back home with me and that died in my arms too. So from now on for the next month the dogs are staying on the lead except for Milli (the Apso) because she's cute and doesn't kill things. I love the Christmas trees just now as they have very bright green tips to their branches where the new growth is coming and it looks very beautiful. I took a picture the other morning of a forest flower that has edible leaves which is known locally as 'fox bread ', so far I haven't been able to find it in English but I want to show the photo anyway as they grow under the big dark trees but the morning sun was just shining through and I thought it looked very pretty.
Tuesday 22nd May 2007
We had some decent rain last night at last and combined with the warm days and nights it seemed this morning as if the whole forest had just exploded with growth. My daughter commented as we walked up the drive how it seemed like the forest was now pressing in on us as it has been so many months with bare trees. It doesn't take long before we forget how bare the landscape was, particularly in June when I seem to have to mow the grass almost daily to keep it under some kind of control!! It does calm down a little after that thank goodness! I noticed a few days ago that there are many blooms on the blueberry bushes (technically bilberries) and I'm hoping that we don't get a late frost like last year which wiped out almost the entire crop.....the temperature had dropped to -6 overnight! I did manage to find a very sheltered part of the forest which had enough to make one lot of dessert but I was one of the few.....and I shall keep the location secret. That disaster was further compounded by the extremely dry summer we than had which really affected the lingon berry crop too....and then it was too dry for the mushrooms but my pumpkins did very well!
I saw my first willow warbler yesterday, unfortunately I saw it after it crashed into my window, I tried to revive it but the large haematoma on its neck indicated that it wasn't going to survive for long. So I just loved it and held it until it passed away. Very sad. I have tried many different things hanging in and on my windows to stop this from happening but with limited success.
Monday 21st May 2007
As I walked down the road with the dogs this morning I was peacefully listening to the sound of the mountain stream gushing down over the rocks with fresh clean water...then I realised, hang on, I don't have any mountains here with gushing streams!! It was the sound of the birch trees with their new soft growth of leaves swishing in the breeze, really beautiful. It reminds me that we do create our own world with our brains, some of us choose to create a calm peaceful world, such as I was with my amazing mountain stream and others create a world of turbulence and turmoil where everyone is out to get them. Both worlds are equally valid but I know which one I choose to create in the theatre of my mind. As I continued with my walk in the forest I listened to the birds singing - you'd be amazed at how you can actually not hear them singing unless you choose to listen - and it's a feeling I've had many times before that I am actually walking through the middle of one of those relaxation tapes!! But I don't have to visualise the soft breeze brushing against my skin, or the sun on my face or the gorgeous warm smell of the pine trees. It's good to list all the things we are grateful for as often as possible and to say thank you for them. I drew an angel card once which gave me the a message 'I accept good graciously into my life, all of my needs are met abundantly for me now and always' and I turned that into a little mantra/song which I quite often sing to myself as I walk or drive...only if I'm alone you understand! It's all that I need to do to connect myself to the universe and all the abundance therein, I don't try and guess my future needs because that takes me out of the present moment, I ask for everything I need in abundance for the purpose I choose for incarnating here, then I can leave all that cosmic ordering to my guides/depot manager and get on with living my life but I always remember to say thank you when I take delivery of something.
Talking of taking delivery, the swallows arrived back here at 3.30 on Thursday and it's lovely to have them swooping round and chattering in their special way which always reminds me of a budgerigar! Last night was the first night that the temperature didn't drop drastically overnight so the green growth will really start to turn this place into a jungle! The garden is looking lovely in the sunshine as the dandelions have bloomed, I always think it's strange that so many gardeners actually take them away from their gardens when they are such useful medicinal plants and to make it even worse they spray chemicals to keep them away too! It's a strange world sometimes but I have to love it!
Tuesday 15th May 2007
I heard my first cuckoo whilst out walking this morning. I also saw that the stream running to my lake was all dried up so I went in search of the beaver dam! Many people round here just prefer to kill the beavers to stop them from chopping down trees around the lakes and flooding places or drying up places with their dams but I do try and live in harmony with the beaver as I think it's a beautiful creature....and of course has the right to life even if I didn't think it was particularly beautiful!! I think I'm walking into a minefield here! Myself and the beaver play a game throughout the summer, he builds a dam, I notice the water has stopped flowing and I go remove the dam, so he builds another one and so on we go. It's a lot more work than just fetching a shotgun but I sleep peacefully at night and I wouldn't have it any other way. So I dismantled his dam, scooped up all the mud and threw it onto the streames edge with all the sticks and pieces of wood. I used to wonder if I should hide all the stuff but the beaver never puts the dam back in the same place, well not yet anyway! Yesterday I noticed the first house martin whizzing over the lake and now as I look out I can see 3 of them checking out the property and the available nesting sites. They don't usually nest here so I don't suppose they will stay long. There are so many barns and farm buildings with amazing places to nest around here, I've cycled into an old farmyard before and the place has been alive with house martins.
Monday 14th May 2007
I had a bit of a shock this morning which totally contrasted with the peace and tranquility I felt yesterday being at one with nature. It's still a part of my dogs nature that they chased and killed the same young hare that had skipped through my garden the other day. The other day they lay sleeping on the porch and didn't notice, I had held my breath and sighed with relief that I was the only one to have seen the hare. This morning all I knew was the high pitched barking that comes from the husky mix and I knew it meant it had found something. When I called the dogs back one of them was carrying the hare. I have since been through a whole range of emotions, I've been angry with my dogs, I've been angry with all the world's carnivores (and that includes me), I've sobbed my heart out for the futility of life, I've mourned the passing of such a short life, I've hated the cruelty of nature, I've hated the whole world for it's injustices. I'm horrified that it was my dogs that did it, I have transferred my beliefs onto my dogs and it seems I expect them to be how I want them to be rather than allowing them their true nature.....and that makes me wonder just how much I do that to everyone I meet in my life because of course we all do it. We have an idea in our head about how life is and we assume that everyone we meet fits into that way of being and yet if we sit and take a look around at the diversity of life then clearly that shows us it is unlikely we all view life the same. Yes the fact remains that the young hare will not be running round again but I now have a choice about how I view the dogs and therefore the world. I can stay appalled at a seemingly random act of violence and spend the rest of my life in despair at life or I can see the authentic essence of the wolf that is still alive inside the dogs, I can see the cycles of the grass, the hare, the wolf and the soil, the cycle of life! I can remember everything I spoke about yesterday about how nothing dies but it is just transformed into a different form of energy. It'll be hard to view it as all part of the natural cycle because I have humanised my dogs but I'll remember it's my transference that is causing me the pain I feel. It's my choice and therefore my pain. It doesn't matter which I choose, neither is 'right' or 'wrong' they are just different ways of viewing something.
Sunday 13th May 2007
I took my Sunday walk up to the Linnavuori to sit and be with nature and to write some of my journal as I could feel issues coming up in me that I wanted to 'talk' out onto paper as I find that a really helpful way to express my feelings. After I had purged myself onto paper I lay and watched the trees, the clouds, the butterflies, I breathed in the smells and immersed myself in the sounds. In nature there is stillness, acceptance and surrender.....all qualities that I am trying to live by myself. The spiritual nature of trees came to me! I observed the total lack of mental noise within a tree. Trees don't spend lifetimes worrying if their branches are the right shape, straight enough, perfect in formation etc. they just grow and they are beautiful just the way they are. Clearly trees don't have egos, trees don't identify with their form, trees exist just as they are however that is. The tree doesn't have a 'story'. When it dies and falls to the ground it doesn't mourn any loss because it doesn't have any ego that it identifies with, there is no difference of existence between the upright living tree and the decomposing mass on the forest floor. They are all aspects of nature and nature is everything! The energy has been transformed into a different kind of matter, one where beetles, ants, worms etc. will live and intertwine. This is not a better state of being neither is it a worse state of being, merely another way of being. With no ego mind the tree is free from the kind of restrictions we humans place on ourselves. The tree doesn't think of itself as a separate entity, it is part of the one-ness of everything, changing shape and form with impunity. When we humans identify with our form we become attached to it because we believe it is who we are and therefore we become afraid of losing it. We struggle to control and maintain all the 'images' we have in our minds of who we are. It is this struggle that stops us from just being. To surrender to change feels like death to us and therefore we fear it and try to avoid it. Yet change is inevitable, a world without change is a dead world. Imagine if the caterpillar developed an ego and identified itself as it's form. It would fear any change and would never transform itself into a butterfly because all it would see would be death. Fear of death is the human condition. Trees bend and move with the wind, remaining in place because of their roots sunk deep into Mother earth. Trees are flexible, they don't try to resist, their strength comes from their grounding and ability to move with the flow. We can learn so very much from trees.
It's sitting up here amongst all the trees that reminds me of the times I've said or heard 'we shouldn't interfere with nature' as if we are somehow separate from it! News flash everyone.....we are an integral part of nature whether we recognise it or not. There is no action I can take that will not impact on nature in some way and so I choose to be as aware as I can be of my actions (cause and effect) and yet I keep the humbleness of knowing that I can't know all the effects. So how do I function day to day knowing that any actions can have far reaching consequences that I will remain ignorant of? I trust that the wholeness of this beautiful earth creation is subject to a higher, further seeing intelligence than the human one. When I sit and look around me I 'know/feel/intuit that it must be so. My part within that lattice work of creation is to play the role I came here to fulfill and let others fulfill theirs. So be it.
Friday 11th May 2007
I've been for a walk up onto the now empty hill and I'm amazed at how different it all looks now, instead of the little forest trail there is now a stone roadway to allow the lorries to come and collect all the logs. It has also provided a place for me to get a picture of my house showing it down by the lake nestled amongst the trees. I was very relieved and I have to admit very surprised to find that one of my favourite old trees had been left alone. This is a huge christmas tree that had clearly been spared during the last logging operation because it takes two people to get your arms round it and I can't even guess how tall it must be.
I've also spotted signs of the beaver over at the smaller lake that feeds into mine. There is a bench on the shore to sit and admire the view and scattered all round on the rock and in the water are the chewed water plant roots that the beaver likes to eat. I took a walk over there again this morning to see if I could spot the beavers lodge, I think I saw it but I decided not to trek round the edge of the lake as it's very hard work when there isn't a track! It was one of those sunny mornings which gives you a clear view through the water and I realised that there was a rowing boat under the water, an old wooden one. I'm not sure that it was put there deliberately as wood doesn't rot under the water, so maybe someone had a sinking! I have a boat on this lake too but I very rarely use it as it means a walk through some dense forest carrying my oars and then dragging the boat into the lake....I'm usually too exhausted by then to do any rowing! I am planning to go early morning or evening to watch the beaver as I think they are lovely animals and I especially like it when they slap their tail onto the water in order to frighten me away from their territory
Wednesday 9th May 2007
Today is a very sad day for me, as I have realised that the logging work I can hear in the distance is taking place on one of the beautiful forested hills surrounding Mairela. The tree line is getting thinner by the hour and I suspect by tomorrow there will be no more majestic christmas trees looking down from that particular place any more. I do understand that trees are a big industry here in Finland but I have also seen such a huge upsurge in the forestry operations since I have come to live here and I'm not imagining it as several Finns I have spoken to have expressed sadness and concern about it too. One person I spoke to a while ago seemed to think it has come about because people are being taxed on the value of their investment (many Finns own land as investments) and the value is higher if it has mature trees on it, therefore to pay the tax they sell the trees to the logging company, they get a lump sum of money in their pocket, the tax on the land goes down significantly (as the main value was in the trees) and life gets easier for them. I can't blame the landowners but I do see how the countryside is being changed and I can't help but wonder if anyone has really thought this policy through. It's all very well that the government want Finland to be a rich country but when they look up from their counting pots in a few years time and find the view out the window is devastated I wonder what they will do then. These trees won't be back as they were for at least 50 years. Like I said, I find it very sad.
I notice from my calendar that today is Europe day which reminds me how much the Finns are getting excited about Eurovision as they are hosting it this year after last year's victory by Lordi. I saw in the local newsagents that there is a Eurovision CD out featuring all the entries....no I didn't buy it. Incidentally I couldn't find anything exciting about Europe day, it's a marking of the day in 1950 when Robert Schuman proposed the creation of an organised Europe to safeguard peace. So that's a nice thing.
Tuesday 8th May 2007
Nearly two weeks ago I had some dentistry work done and ended up losing two big teeth and having stitches in my gum. So when I came home I was in some discomfort.....ok , I was in huge amounts of pain! I had decided to treat everything naturally, so I didn't use the prescriptions of pain killers and antibiotics that the dentist had given to me.....I didn't tell her I wasn't going to use them as I didn't want to get a lecture, I'm such a wimp! I treated the pain with normal healing, just by putting my hands onto my face. To keep myself free from infection I boosted my immune system by drinking tea made from my recently collected chaga mushrooms and I occasionally disinfected the site using tea tree oil. I am pleased to announce that everything is fine and the dentist is very pleased with how it all looks.....but I still didn't tell her how I did it. I just want to make sure that I'm clear about what I did and my intentions behind it. I'm not saying that I wanted to stay in pain because I certainly don't, I know how quickly debilitating that is, I just chose to deal with the physical pain in a safe, natural way and there is nothing more natural and totally safe than healing energy channeled through my own hands. I also didn't want to ingest antibiotics if there had been no need to do so because when the body's immune system is functioning at its best then there is no need for them as our bodies are an amazing act of creation with superb self healing powers. unfortunately our bodies are constantly being bombarded with toxins and poisons via our processed foods, cigarettes, alcohol, polluted environments, household products and EMF (to name a few!) that we are very rarely functioning at our best and that is why I chose something from Mother Nature's larder to give it a helping hand.
I've also been using a lot of sound healing in the past few weeks. I think that the healing properties of certain sounds are very powerful as they immediately take us into all levels at the same time and therefore a holistic healing automatically happens. For example, if I use colour as a healing tool then it can be visualised and also felt to be surrounded by but we are limited with how we perceive it, dialoging during a healing can just take people straight into their heads and therefore operates on only the metal level but with sounds and music we have the physical vibration, the emotions are definitely touched by sound, it stimulates the mental levels and lifts us into the spiritual planes too because we don't 'see' sound so we don't get it fixated into a certain level, we can't get it into one of our convenient 'boxes' that we categorize things into and therefore we stay more open to the whole experience which allows greater balancing and thereby healing to take place. There are many CD's out there on the market promising to do so many things, I use Jonathan Goldman's work as they incorporate many aspects within each recording, they are beautiful to listen to and you know immediately that you are listening to a special collection of harmonics. I used these CD's to heal one of my dogs who had been badly injured. Whilst she was in the house I left her in a room with a healing CD playing 24 hours and her recovery was amazing.
Sunday 6th May 2007
Coming back late from the airport last night I saw my very first live badger, ever! I used to see them lots in the UK but only ever dead on the side of the road or in a a nature program. I also saw another raccoon dog too on the journey home, it's quite a good time to spot wildlife that I don't normally get to see. I noticed today that the Pied Flycatcher (Ficedula hypoleuca) has returned to Mairela and it is checking out the new birdboxes around the place. I had though that a bluetit family had moved into the box in front of the cottage window but it seems they changed their mind and moved to the other one and now the pied flycatcher is trying it out. Yesterday morning there was a pair of Red Throated Divers (Gavia stellata) on the lake, there has been a lone diver for the past 3 years so it is quite exciting to think I may get to hear the sound of tiny paddles on the lake! The other diver, the Black Throated Diver (Gavia arctica)has been around a few times but they don't tend to stay on this lake as they prefer the bigger lakes. Another unusual happening this week was the arrival of 2 more male Goldeneyes trying to get the attention of Mrs Goldeneye on the lake. There was a lot of to-ing and fro-ing across the lake but they seem to have given up and disappeared now.
Tuesday 1st May 2007
Today is Mayday which is the official beginning of the summer! The other supermarket will be open on Sunday from now until October. In days gone by it was a fertility festival marked by folk dancing around the phallic maypole, which was traditionally made from a birch tree. The eve of may day is known as Beltane and we marked this time with a traditional bonfire, the smoke from the fire is said to cleanse bad spirits from the house so we make it quite a large bonfire with lots of stuff to produce smoke. When it has reduced in size somewhat we jump through the fire to cleanse our bodies with the smoke. It's amazing to think that I had taken my first dip into the lake on the previous Saturday night, as the Finns would say I had washed off my winter coat!
Friday 27th April 2007
Last week I wrote an article for a magazine about the birch tree looking at its healing properties and its place in the traditions and cultures of the northern lands. I knew about the qualities of the leaves and the sap and the bark but whilst researching I found out about a unique mushroom which grows on the birch tree known as the Chaga mushroom. Apparently this fungi has the best health giving properties of all the medicinal mushrooms and in particular is an age old cancer therapy, 400 years old in fact! It boosts the immune system and promotes DNA repair. It sounded just the ticket to me and I decided to keep an eye out for it. Strangely enough that day I went for a walk on a route I had never been before and at the end of m walk there was a tree with these mushrooms growing on it right in front of me. Anyone would think my guides had led me there! I went back yesterday armed with the right equipment to remove the mushrooms and now I'm slowly setting about grinding them up into powder so that I can make tea from them. Peasants in Russia used to use it as a coffee substitute (but it doesn't resemble coffee in any way other than colour!) and a local doctor (many years ago) realised that nobody ever got cancer, which he attributed to the mushroom tea. I see it is also available to buy on the internet but I'm really pleased and very grateful to have found such a wonderful natural remedy on my door step.
I have pasted the article at the bottom of my home page if you should wish to read it.
Tuesday 24th April 2007
I have a cutting of an article from one of last Tuesday's UK newspapers. It's talking about the results of a survey compiled by researchers at Cambridge University called The European Social Survey which looked at countries in Western Europe to determine those with the happiest folk and the most satisfaction with life. Denmark came top but I note that Finland came second and the UK came down at number 9 (out of 15). The biggest trend that was identified from the survey was that it was the highest levels of trust that created the highest levels of happiness. It was suggested that although the last 15 years have brought continuous economic success and rising wealth they have not produced corresponding increases in general well-being. The high levels of trust here are no surprise considering Finland was reported to be the least corrupt country in the world with Iceland and New Zealand last year from a survey done by Transparency International, a Berlin based organisation.
This reminds me of the old saying that money can't buy happiness, which is true but also I note that poverty doesn't bring happiness either! money is an issue that I have struggled with (spiritually and literally speaking!). It has taken me years of looking at my core beliefs, identifying them and unraveling them to reveal the truth of their origins for me to start to have a good relationship with money. I was one of those folk who believed that money was 'bad', as opposed to those who think money can buy everything and is therefore 'good'. Truth be told we are all labouring under a misapprehension as money is neutral really, it's just another form of energy which can be exchanged for whatever you wish. Just because some people use it for having power over another doesn't make the money responsible for the action. As with most things in life it is the intention behind the action which determines the quality of the energy behind the transaction. This is the same reason why I support fair Trade products wherever possible because the quality of energy behind a product produced by a person who is getting a decent exchange for their efforts, who is supporting their community and family is much different to the energetic qualities of something produced in a sweat shop. This is an extreme example but it helps to show what I mean. It's the same reason why mum's cooking done out of love will always taste better than something mass produced by a machine, the energetic part of the ingredients is also an important part of the equation. What is it about Jamie Oliver's cooking which sets it apart from others? the passion he puts into everything is part of the energetic makeup of the food. Take any famous painting and feel the energy of their passion, their very essence, imbued into the very paint. It's that passion, that soul, that essence that makes the difference between a painting and a masterpiece and we all have our own essence there inside of us. Some of us have it buried deeper than others but it is still there. You can never extinguish your essence but you can cover it over and we all do. the moment you tell a child her poem doesn't rhyme or the grass in her picture should be green or his song was ok but....These are the moments that the essence starts to be covered up, so beware of those moments, not only with our children but with ourselves. sometimes the little child in us comes out to play, so just for today why not let it. i'll write you a note for Miss if you need one.
Monday 23rd April 2007
I saw the pied wagtail this morning for the first time this year, yay! In Finland there are very many people interested in who saw the first such and such bird of the year, you'll even find reports of nature sightings in the newspapers and on the news which is a very refreshing change. There is a saying here about the coming of summer which goes;
Kuu kiurusta kesään, puoli kuuta peiposesta, viikon verran västäräkistä, ei päivääkä pääskysestä.
A month from a lark to summer, a half month from a chaffinch, a week's time from a wagtail, no days from a swallow.
I've had my fish cages out in the lake for a few days now as this is the time of year to catch a pike as it comes to the edge to find a place to lay its eggs. When I first came here I found it hard to believe that a fish would just swim into one of these cages made from wire mesh but they do. I've had some nice sized catches in previous springs. So far I have just had a few perch which I leave in the cage and they find their own way back out again. I should take the cage out to other places round the lake but that means going rowing to check it every night and it can get quite cold still out on the lake.....I'm being a bit of a wimp I know.
Thursday 19th April 2007
It was a very cold night last night so there was lots of frost around this morning. It also meant that the christmas trees had little frozen droplets of water on the ends of their branches which were reflecting in the early morning sun and looked so pretty. I was admiring these on my walk whilst the dogs seemed to be charging off everywhere today, when I looked down the forest path I saw a big white thing which I assumed was Sylka and said 'Oh there you are' to which this animal got up and hopped off....it was the hare! I forget just how big they are when they are up close! It only moved a little further down the path and sat and watched me again, then it hopped into the forest. I called the dogs back as I now knew who they had been chasing after, finally one of them came chasing over the hill but as I spoke to it I realised it was the hare again! I had seen two playing in a field yesterday and they were in their summer brown coat but this guy was still very white.....I'm sure he was a male hare as he really was very big. I looked up the qualities of the hare totem, I still had them on the computer from my meditation group as I had taken us on a shamanic journey a few weeks ago to find our animal totem. The qualities were guile, paradox and contradiction, living by one's own wits, receiving hidden teachings and intuitive messages, quick-thinking, humility, moving through fear and strengthening intuition. Many thanks to Animal Spirits for their interesting and informative site.
Another spring plant that I wanted to mention is the February Daphne or Mezereon/Mezereum (Daphne mezercum) which just looks like a twig stuck in the ground with purple flowers coming out of it as just like the coltsfoot it produces its flowers first. Unlike the coltsfoot it should NOT be picked and eaten! The text books tell me it's a small European deciduous shrub with fragrant lilac coloured flowers followed by red berries on highly toxic twigs. Other names for it include paradise plant, Dwarf laurel and spurge olive. All parts of the plant produce irritation on contact (sounds like some people I know!), on the skin it produces erythema (redness of the skin due to dilation of capillaries), vesiculation (produce blisters) and ulceration and eating the berries burns the mouth and swells up the lips and tongue. It is used in homeopathy for various skin complaints including eczema, rashes and shingles. A truly awesome natural product that helps heal many....but do not pick it!
Yesterday I heard and saw the pair of Common Sandpipers (Actitis hypoleucos) that nest around here every year. I occasionally spot one of them feeding in the marshy part of the garden but more usually I see them as they skit off across the lake, when they have been disturbed, with a loud trilling voice.
Sunday 15th April 2007
As it was such a gorgeous day here as I believe it was over most of Europe I spent a few hours sitting and laying up on the Linnavuori just letting the earth energy be absorbed into my body, listening to the birds in the forest, watching the woodpeckers in the trees below me, the raven circling the tree tops on a far hill, my first bumble bee of the year and watching all the various types of ant marching past me on the mossy ground. The air was ripe with all the warm smells of summer and I could see the melting ice getting smaller and smaller on the lake below me. I spotted what I thought at first was a female Goldeneye (brown head) with a male mallard (green head) but on closer inspection through my binoculars I realised they were a pair of Goosanders (Mergus merganser), it's the first time I've ever seen them but they are unmistakable when you see their long sawbill.
In the afternoon my daughter and I got the boat back out from it's winter rest, eventually found a plug big enough for the hole and went for a nice long row around the lake, did a little bit of ice breaking in a few parts too. It's amazing how my ski tracks were still visible even on the last parts of the melting ice!
Saturday 14th April 2007
There have been lots more signs of spring coming today. The frogs have woken up from their long winter hibernation and are now singing away in the ditch in the garden. They usually stay there for about 2 weeks until their eggs are laid and fertilized, then the spawn is left and the singing stops. I haven't seen any toads yet, they usually sit around the edge of the lake. I saw my first Redwing (Turdus iliacus) rummaging around in the bushes by the house too, they come over to Scandinavia to breed. I also managed to get a picture of one of my favourite butterflies, I don't know what it's name is as I've never seen it in England, it's quite big with beautiful brown wings with a cream edge.
Another sign of spring...madness...my daughter dipped in the lake during our Saturday night sauna! I went down the ladder to my knees but that was enough for me, after all there was still ice a couple of metres from the pier!
Friday 13th April 2007
I saw so many new signs of spring this morning, I forget how much happens around this time of the year. I saw a capercaille (Tetrao urogallus) whilst out on a long walk this morning and I think he was responsible for all the big piles of enormous yellow bird poo that I saw along the forest road! Then just as I was coming back to the house I heard the unmistakable sound of the male snipe (Gallinago gallinago) displaying in his high switchback flight which produces a buzzing whirr known as drumming from its stiff tail feathers. I couldn't see him yet but I know that I will do over the next few weeks.....although he'll just be a diving dot in the sky making an unworldly noise! When I came back into the cultivated part of the garden Mr & Mrs Woodpecker (great spotted) were both feasting on the sunflowers seeds I've scattered around. They flew up into the willow tree by the sauna where I was able to witness Mrs Woodpecker tear off a strip of bark. This is very exciting for me (yes I know I should get out more) as I have been pondering for a while what creature it is that strips off bark from trees around here. I know of two places where there are fir trees in various stages of stripping in close proximity and I had wondered if it was squirrel, raccoon dog or the woodpecker or maybe a combination of all three. Then as if that wasn't exciting enough the Goldeneye ( Bucephala clangula) pair are back on the lake and I am hoping that they nest here in one of the nesting boxes on the lake's shore. They are a nervous duck that dives under the water to collect snails and insect larvae. I was privileged a few years ago to witness the mating display where the male raises his head and arches it over his back. Whilst out on my walk I also saw the pair of black woodpeckers (Dryocopus martius) fly to a particular spot where I think they may have a nest, I'm going to leave it for a while as I don't want to disturb them and then take a look, leaving the dogs at home!
Yesterday I engaged in a new spring activity, collecting birch sap. I've never tried it before but now that I am convinced that it doesn't harm the trees in any way I drilled a hole and strapped on a bottle and have collected a few litres of it already. It isn't as sweet as maple sap and requires much more to convert it into syrup but I'm just taking it as it comes as it is very rich in potassium, calcium, phosphorus, magnesium, manganese, zinc, sodium and iron which can't be bad! It is also possible that drinking it will protect you from allergic reactions to birch pollen later in the season. I don't suffer myself but my daughter has reacted before so she is being a guinea pig. The Coltsfoot tea I made for her sorted out her cough which was going round the school.
It's now evening time and I have spent a grand day watching the Goldeneyes feeding on the lake and resting on the ice, they were joined later on in the day by the mallard pair that always nest on this lake somewhere. I was sitting here typing when the Ural owl flew into a tree on the lake edge so I went out to look at him and try to get some more pictures, whilst I was outside I heard the male snipe again so I looked up to see if I could spy him and above me were two cranes (Grus grus) flying north!! I feel so happy and grateful to be living here and seeing all these wonderful sights, I feel like the luckiest person alive and I know how much I owe to my cancer for waking me up and getting me to look at what I loved in this life and embracing it.
Thursday 12th April 2007
April seems to be speeding by very quickly! The weather has been sunny of late and quite cold but today promises to be warmer. The melted portion of the lake is growing bigger by the day and I think the next few days should pretty well finish off the ice. However, just for the sheer hell of it I stood on the ice again this morning, just one last stand, very close to the pier in case of emergencies! There is such an amazing difference just looking at the moving water against the static stuff, I took a picture to show the contrast although I realise that a picture to show the contrast between something moving and still is a bit bizarre but you know what I mean.
As I walked down to the sauna this morning, clanking all my new buckets I bought yesterday, the owl flew past me into the trees where it was promptly attacked by a pair of great tits who obviously thought he was too close to their nesting site. The owl did actually move again away from the tits! I do hope he becomes a regular feature of my garden as I'm sure there are plenty of mice and voles around for him to live on.
One of the most interesting things that I like in the spring is the emergence of the Coltsfoot flowers ( Tussilago farfara) from beneath all the dead leaves and grass. When the rest of the landscape is looking like a sun parched Savannah after months under the snow these gorgeous yellow flowers are one of the first things to pop out of the ground. The leaves don't come along for weeks after. But Mother Nature doesn't just pop them out for nothing, they are very good for releasing mucous (catarrh, phlegm) and other such gross stuff from the chest, they can also be used to reduce inflammation and ease coughs, sores and ulcers. The dries leaves used to be smoked as a remedy for asthma! It's Mother Natures way of giving us something to clear out our chests after the winter, kind of like a spring clean. It's things like this that make me realise just how much is provided for us by the earth that we don't even notice anymore. I've started to use much more of the natural remedies that I find on my doorstep these days because it fits more naturally into my systems, however I count myself blessed to be able to do that so easily and without fears of pollution or getting it wrong...there is a strong tradition of using natural remedies here and I have some very good books to help me.
Sunday 8th April 2007
I had a most unusual visitor in the garden today, a Ural owl (Strix uralensis) flew down onto a stone by the sauna, then jumped down behind it presumably to eat some poor unsuspecting mouse then sat back up on the stone. I recognised it through my binoculars as a Ural which means that it wouldn't be too afraid of me if I crept down to the sauna to take a picture. I saw one here in the first autumn I was here and I was amazed at this owl that wasn't afraid of me and I followed it all round the garden talking to it up in it's various trees. Then a few weeks later when my new bird book arrived, one that included all the European species too, I read up about this owl as very territorial and likely to strike a person in the face!! And there was me following it round and shining a light in it's face and chatting away to it....he must have realised that I hadn't yet read the book! This guy today sat and posed for me for a while then flew off to sit by the cottage where of course I followed it and then it flew into the trees and disappeared. The other birds in the garden weren't so happy about his visit as they are busy selecting nesting boxes. I've seen a pair of blue tits checking out one of my new boxes just outside the cottage window so guests should get some good views over the coming weeks.
Saturday 7th April 2007
The local male choir celebrated their 50 years tonight with a concert at the local church in Kuhmoinen. I went along to enjoy a wonderful selection of local talent and beautiful music. Two of the girls (sisters) that share my daughter's school taxi performed a marvelous trio of numbers, my favourite of which was Vivaldi's Spring from the Four Seasons. I was blown away by the skill of the violin playing which really stirred up emotions in me. An amazing evening all round and I hope that the choir continue for another 50 years. The church is also a very beautiful place inside and out, well worth a visit. It has a separate bell tower.
Friday 6th April 2007
I saw a brambling (Fringilla montifringilla) in the garden this morning looking a bit bedraggled so I think it was half way between it's winter and summer coat. I often see the odd one in the spring mixed up with the chaffinch flocks. I also found a crocus flower poking out from my flower bed.
Taking advantage of the sunshine I continued to clear a part of the forest that had started to encroach on the garden and make it more open by removing all the smaller trees that had sprung up there. I was using my favourite weapon of choice, the axe! My guardian angels were busy once again showing me the phone cable before I chopped through it, I can't believe that the phone company buried only 1cm under the moss!! I found the whole exercise of clearing most cleansing for my mind which had been cluttered with stuff. It reminded me how things do grow and start to strangle other things when we leave stuff unattended. There were willow trees, birch trees, alder trees and christmas trees all trying to grow in the same space which meant that nobody would grow properly. I think I found a whole new therapy, give a person an axe and a small part of the forest to clear, letting all their frustration with the unwanted things in there life be represented by the trees being chopped out and then stand back to admire the wanted trees standing straight and proud in their own clear space where they can be seen.
After that I spent the evening making some traditional Easter branches by decorating willow twigs with feathers and tissue paper. These twigs are known as virpovitsa, the willow buds symbolise the awakening spring and the feathers and tissue make flowers as there are few flowers out in the Northern climes at Easter. Many years ago folk believed that witches would be out flying during the time Christ was in his tomb and now it is traditional for children to dress as witches or sooty faced folk and sell the decorated twigs, or recite good luck poems in exchange for sweets. From the East comes a tradition of blessing people by whisking them with willow twigs and now the two are combined. The twigs are in a vase with some birch twigs that I brought into the house to bud, where they are now providing lots of spring time fresh energy as well as looking very pretty.
Thursday 5th April 2007
I took the dogs along a different track this morning and we found two elk. I could see the dogs up ahead and I could count 3 objects moving and one of the dogs was barking. When I caught up with them they had lost interest but standing 30 metres away from me were two elk, a youngster and a slightly older one but not fully grown. Maybe it was a calf and a young mum as they has just stood their ground against the dogs....typically the dogs weren't interested when they had nothing to chase! I stood and chatted to the elk for a while, as you do, then when I took a step back the way I'd come they turned round and left across the grassy area where the forest has been chopped down.
It's funny when I talk about elk to my Finnish friends as some of them call them moose, it's the same thing but more of an American word. We debate why you have a goose and some geese but why don't you have a moose and some meese....but then nobody said that English was a logical language!
Tuesday 3rd April 2007
Here I am back from my studies again! I'd calculated correctly about the ice on the lake, I wouldn't have been able to do any of my work if I'd have left it till this week. Most of the snow has disappeared and there are melted holes in the lake. I did a little leaf raking this morning but I'll take that slowly, after all the garden stretches quite far and I do live in the middle of a forest! I usually leave the leaves until the spring as they give a little protection to the grass and some of the creatures that live in it.
Part of my course last week was looking at past lives. Just a few years ago I didn't believe in them at all but then I started to wonder where some of our knowledge comes from in this lifetime and eventually I felt that it would make sense that we had many incarnations even just to enjoy and experience the many facets of being. Anyway, regardless of what I believe about them using past life experiences for a healing is really helpful as it shows important aspects of another life which gives us a deeper understanding of what is happening to us in this life. Past lives are like mirrors, sometimes we are the victim and sometimes we are the perpetrator but it is from viewing both aspects that we learn the ultimate truth of any situation, that really there are no victims or perpetrators except for what we choose to believe in. It's like taking a trance like journey to walk a mile in another's shoes in order to fully embody their experience. In that respect it's no different than some life experiences. For instance I have been lucky enough to have lived some of my life in another country (here!) and that has shown me the subtle aspects of racism that we all carry, it's just another aspect of the fear of the unknown, or the fear of there not being enough. Some people will live all their life in just one country and never experience both sides yet if it was an issue in their life then probably a past life experience could show them the complementary view. I'm certainly not a fan of past life stories becoming an important aspect of who I am. Getting caught up in the story to the detriment of the learning doesn't really serve a useful purpose...and seriously just how many of us can have all been the same king or queen!!
let me share some of my experience. As I came into the life I saw a young woman quickly dart back from a stone window, she was dressed from mediaeval times. At first I thought she was frightened but outside the window were rolling hills and a village in the distance, and I noticed she was hiding but she was smiling. She was playing hide and seek! Along came the handsome young man on a white horse and I realised they were lovers meeting in secret in the woods at the little stone house. It was strange that I was observing this as if from a third person but I thought that maybe that was the way. The lovers kissed and I thought that I was watching my fantasies of how love should be being played out in front of me. Then I noticed that something or someone was watching them, a malevolent presence was spying behind the old oak tree. It was an ugly old crone and she was thinking very spiteful thoughts towards the embracing couple.....then I realised that I was the ugly old crone!! Damn it! I could feel how I had been betrayed by love and I had become bitter and had allowed this bitterness to consume me and turn me into a twisted old woman both physically and mentally. Then we moved on to earlier times and I could see that I was beautiful then, just like Snow White. I had been in love but one day my man told me that he didn't really love me, he wanted to be honest with me and not lead me on. I had been unable to accept this and spent the rest of my life trying to exact my revenge on the man and in the process I had consumed myself with hatred and bitterness. Then I could see that my 'partner' was the guy who in this lifetime is filled with bitterness at an identical situation (you'll excuse me if I don't divulge anymore here!). The learnings from these experiences shows us again that there is no 'right' or 'wrong' going on in this life, we are all just sampling different aspects of the same cycle. I have no idea and no way to prove if this lifetime ever actually happened but it's irrelevant anyway because it is the teaching that it allowed me to experience totally with all my being that was the important part. And please don't worry about writing to tell me how crazy I am, I respect your opinion and I'm happy for you to have whatever beliefs you have. Our beliefs don't have to match for us to love and respect each other. Truly.
Monday 26th March 2007
Four swans flew overhead this morning as we walked up to the school taxi, they sound so awesome as they go overhead, even if they weren't trumpeting you can hear the noise of their wings from quite a distance. I went to buy a new pontoon to go under the pier as the final part of my stabilization project. I jacked up the pier on the ice, with a small prayer that the weight of the entire pier wouldn't break the ice under the jack. Once jacked up I could slide the extra pontoon underneath. Finally job done! All I have to do now is to wait for all the ice to melt so that I can check if it works.
Sunday 25th March 2007
Today was another warm day, which means 10 degrees around here! The ice on the lake is melting quite quickly now so I had to take advantage of it for a while longer and fix some of the supports for the pier. It's so much easier to work under the pier when you can just walk round it and squat on the ice, so I leveled it out a little which I'm hoping will stop it from moving so much during the summer months. It's only a small pontoon and if more than 4 people stand on it it can sway quite strongly, it's great for balance exercising but it tends to freak people a little so I'm stabilizing it...well that's the theory anyway but I'm no engineer!
I heard some Whooper swans (Cygnus cygnus) flying today which is another sign of spring, they come to Scandinavia to breed. They are a large bird and their call is like a trumpeting sound. We had a couple of pairs arguing on the ice a few years ago one Sunday morning and the noise was incredible. I also saw a few brimstone butterflies fluttering around in the forest which was most unexpected as the nights are still very cold.
It's also Annunciation day today...at least it was 2,000 odd years ago. This was the day that the Angel Gabriel told Mary that she would be giving birth to Jesus.
Saturday 24th March 2007
The spring weather has come back again so I managed to get out into the garden and do some jobs with my chainsaw! One of them was taking down an old half rotten tree beside the sauna. I was a bit nervous about getting the cut wrong and sending it through the sauna roof instead of onto the frozen lake....and then I didn't know if it would smash through the ice but I needn't have worried on either count, the whole thing ran quite smoothly. It's always a shame to cut down an old tree but it will give more light and room to the birch tree growing next to it. Emboldened by my success with this tree I set off across the lake to cut and collect some of the windfall trees. It's much easier to collect them by walking and sledding across the lake than by rowing boat! I was tired on the way back and so I made use of my dog's sledding ability and enlisted her help with towing the logs back.
Thursday 22nd March 2007
The weather has turned back to cold again since last week's early spring, much the same as the UK from what I hear. I finally got round to making the rowanberry jelly from the berries I picked last autumn. This was the first time I'd ever made anything like that but it turned out successfully. The jelly is quite tart but high in vitamin C. If you dry the berries they can be chewed to cure hoarseness or strung as a necklace to keep from free from ill health. The rowan tree is a tree of protection......it was the tree that saved Thor from being swept away in an underworld river. I've also got a few berry laden branches hanging up in my home.....for aesthetic reasons and protection!
Wednesday 21st March 2007
Just after midnight was the spring equinox, or vernal equinox or Ostara or Summer Finding (the Asatru festival dedicated to Thor) which marks the time between the summer solstice and the winter solstice when the day and night are equal times. Obviously this doesn't work completely over all the different time zones but you get the general gist! The sun rises due east and sets due west. In the pagan calendar this was the time of conception, when the light triumphs over darkness.
Friday 16th March 2007
I heard the blackbird singing this morning which is definitely a real sign of spring coming! I looked it up in my book and in 2005 I didn't hear it singing until April 2nd. Also that spring the black woodpecker didn't come back until 30th March. I didn't walk over the lake this morning, there is so much water sitting on top of it now that it would really difficult to walk without falling over and of course not knowing if the ice is still safe. It probably is as it can be a metre think during the winter but I'm in no hurry to test my theories.
Whilst looking
into my day book I noticed that Nero died this day in 37 and Caesar died yesterday
in 44B.C. Beware the Ides of March was what Caesar was warned by a seer but
he didn't heed the warning. He should have stayed in bed instead of going to
the senate where he was assassinated. I like the little story that goes with
it. Caesar spoke to the seer humourously saying: "Well, the Ides of March
are come," and the seer replied softly: "Ay, they are come, but they
are not gone."
Thursday 15th March 2007
I took a little detour through the forest this morning to see how much walking on top of the snow I could do, the results being about 60/40. Some sheltered places around trees weren't strong enough to hold my weight but Milli, the puppy, was ok just walking across the top of everything. I could hear the unmistakable sounds of the black woodpecker (Dryocopus martius) this morning, I think it was the territorial call as I guess that they are looking for nesting sites. I did eventually get a glimpse of it as it flew away from me and the dogs, apart from the typical woodpecker undulating flight and the black colour I wouldn't have been able to know what it was without recognising the call. I'm trying to teach myself the difference between the drumming of all the local woodpeckers because as spring approaches it will enable me to distinguish them. Each has a different amount of drums per second, so it's not something you can actually count in your head but you have to learn the beat. I find it really difficult when faced with just a one off to be able to place exactly which it is.
Talking of nesting sites I was putting more nesting boxes yesterday as it was a gorgeous day. One of those funny days when you look up at the blue sky and the pine trees and feel a warm breeze on your face and then you look down and see all the snow and the bare birch trees. I now have 9 boxes around the garden and lots of shelf space under the eaves of the sauna as the Spotted Flycatcher (Muscicapa striata) likes to nest there. I love having lots of birds nesting around here and I like to encourage them with lots of regular food and protection! A couple of years ago I had a problem with the woodpecker trying to get at the great tit nest, he flew away every time I shouted 'oi'. It started me to think about how we talk about 'you shouldn't interfere with nature' but I decided that I was a part of nature, not some separate entity as we humans quite arrogantly seem to think we are sometimes. The birds around here, woodpeckers included, have a symbiotic relationship with me, it's a two way street. I look after them as best I know how and they give me endless pleasure and they also provide natural protection for my garden later in the year by eating some of the insects. It's all about balance and the birds do a fine job balancing themselves and their resources without any help from me. This led me on to wondering if we were the only species to do something just for pleasure, like I feed the birds and I get the pleasure of just watching them. We tend to think about an animal's life as just eat, sleep and procreate yet when I sit and watch the swifts in the summer time up on my favourite rock I can see that their very existence is all about the sheer pleasure of flying and soaring. Now those guys know what life is all about, just being themselves and doing their thing.
Wednesday 14th March 2007
We've had a couple of days of thaw and the speed at which the snow is receding is quite amazing! Monday night stayed quite warm and large patches of water appeared on the lake, some ice blue because they acme from melting snow and ice and some yellow brown from the lake water coming through again. The parts of my road in the sunshine are now bare and the parts in the shade of the trees are pure ice and very difficult to walk on. The puppy reminds me of Bambi on ice when she runs and yesterday when there was a bit of a wind she was actually blown down the hill....very funny to watch! I was also surprised to see that under some of the melting snow the grass still had some green patches, this is the first time that I've ever seen that happen here as usually the grass has been killed by being covered for so long, it's no wonder that I feel as if this has been the quickest winter ever! Last night was a beautiful clear starry night and so the melted ice froze again and I chanced walking back across the lake again this morning, I avoided the long seam of brown which indicates a split in the ice and all was well...clearly as I'm sat here typing this! The snow is now at that brilliant stage where you can just walk on top of it as it's set like concrete with the cold night.
Saturday 10th March 2007
There have been many sets of tracks that I've seen going across the road where I'm walking the dogs, lots of elk raveling between the different sides of the forest. You can see clearly where the hare and the fox have spent the night in a dance with each other. The squirrel's tracks are really cute and just travel from tree to tree. There are too many different types of vole, shrew, mouse and stoat tracks for me to know what belongs to what. I had noticed some strange tracks lately that looked like a fox or a dog would leave but they were really small but today I found out that they belonged to the supikoira because I found it dead at the end of the lake, I think it had been hit by a car. I went to check it and I picked it up with one hand to see what it looked like....man do they smell bad I had to keep my hand away from me until I could get home and wash it! A supikoira is called a raccoon dog in North America, it looks a little like a badger, maybe more like a raccoon but then I've never seen one of those! Here is some pictures and information about raccoon dogs
Friday 9th March 2007
Yesterday I visited Jyväskylä University's school of business and economics to talk about my business to students on a course called 'Evolutionary Economics and Organisations' in my capacity as a real live living model of just such a thing! The course looks at the changes within businesses illustrated and explained using analogies of evolutionary biology. The coincidental chances of life and the growth and/or learning taken from such occurrences. Very different from the more traditional neoclassical economics based on profit maximisation. It went really well and the students were very open which of course is what the basis of such thinking dictates, to leave yourself open to all possibilities rather than narrowing your field by deciding before you start what kind of outcomes you would like or are expecting. A totally unexpected, enjoyable and interesting day for me. One of those times when the energetic connections being made, in both directions, are almost tangible because they are so different to the norm.
The weather this morning is a mixture of rain and snow which should make the drive to the shops an interesting one, a blend of driving and bob sleighing!!
Thursday 8th March 2007
Lots of snow overnight, so that was the end of the brief spring time days! I've chucked loads of sunflowers seeds on top of my igloo structure as it looks great with all the birds over it and I can see them better from the window as I type this. I find it really interesting that every now and again all the birds (about 30) fly back up to the tree, all except one that is and I think the one that's left is probably the one who shouted 'Look out!!' and then laughs and continues eating whilst the others fly off. Must admit, I'd do the same thing as it's very funny.
By the way , it's International Women's day today.....I note that there is no International Men's day, that's strange but not really surprising. Wouldn't it be wonderful if we just had International people days where we celebrated people together as one big family and then when we got the hang of that we could make that every day or maybe every morning for a few minutes we could think about the whole world as our family and send them all our love....just a thought...
Wednesday 7th March 2007
Strange thing this morning, there are thousands of little insects sitting and hopping on top of the snow. I thought they were seeds at first but my daughter took a closer look and discovered they were moving. I'd love to know where they came from, it's a warm (3 degrees) and misty morning. At first I thought that maybe they had been blown here by some weather system but as I walked I noticed that they were mostly around tree areas so maybe they have hatched en mass from some winter slumber in the trees. I couldn't even pinpoint a particular type of tree they were underneath only that they were around more christmas tree places. I'm sure the birds would love to eat them but they are so tiny I'm not sure they'll notice them. Although it really feels like the start of Spring today, it's a bit early in the year to think it will last.
Tuesday 6th March 2007
Last Friday when I was in Helsinki I had a few hours spare before going to the airport and so I headed to Stockman. Stockman is a huge department store on Mannerheimintie, to me it's the Finnish equivalent of Harrods.You can buy pretty much anything there, it's the place I head to at Christmas if I want a jar of Quality Street or a box of shortbread with ginger pieces. The newsagent section has so many different magazines and newspapers in a myriad of different languages, you know when you're in there that this is a cosmopolitan city. I usually feel very scruffy and out of place when I go there, as if Helsinki is crammed full of posh people but I realise that's my issue!! If everytime I went to London I only ever went to Harrods then I would get the same lopsided opinion of London too. I also feel terribly inadequate because I only speak one language too but I'll get over that too!
Whilst I was in Stockman I needed to visit the loo and this provided me with the perfect moment to realise how very very British I am....let me explain. I found the loo and carefully hung up the bag with Milli in it and reminded myself not to leave the loo without her. So there I am doing my thing and just standing up to finish when someone opens the door at lightening speed with me stood there in all my glory...this poor lady said 'Anteeksi' and closed the door but I was struck by what I did....I apologised to her...the words that came out of my mouth were 'I'm sorry' and that made me laugh as I'm sure it's only a Brit that would apologise to someone for not locking their cubicle and being there half naked when they walked in. Same as I always apologise when people tread on my feet, my Finnish friends can't understand it but I tell them it's not something I think about, it just comes out my mouth. I think this apologetic thing is part of the collective consciousness of the Brits, you're born with it in your DNA.
Monday 5th March 2007
Finally I can reveal the secret I have been keeping for the last week! I bought a Lhaso Apso puppy for my daughter but I didn't want to put it here because she was away and I wanted it to be a surprise for her at the airport on Friday....and it was! Puppy's name is Milli, she's 4 months old and very soft, sweet and smart. The Lhaso Apso breed originates in Tibet where it was bred by the holy men and nobles and was used as a watchdog in temples and monasteries. It was thought to be a sacred dog sometimes referred to as the Lion Dog of Tibet. This probably explains why she was so at home in my meditation class last week and why she settles down so happily under my healing couch when I'm giving a treatment. She loves coming out on walks with the big girls but I stick her in a shoulder bag and carry her some of the way as she's still very young. I would love to post a picture but my camera is now in for repair for a few weeks.
The weather has warmed up a lot with daytime temperatures above freezing these past few days, consequently the huge piles of snow on the roof finally came down with almighty crashes that shook the whole house when some land on the porch roof. I cleared most of it away to one side before the overnight freeze could weld it to the spot. The Siberian lavender bushes over the path to the car have now returned to their normal height as their snow burden has been released and I can now walk to my car without stooping for the first time in over a month.
Already this morning the bird songs seemed to be taking on a hint of Spring but I feel cheated as this winter took so long to get going I don't feel like I've had a proper winter, which was about par for the course in the UK but I had expected better here! Maybe I'll have to move to Siberia...
However, the winter is not over yet as we still have more snow falling. The snow has more water in it now so as the night temperature drops it gets frozen so it has a crusty top to it. Eventually at some point in march you get e a time when you can walk across the top of the snow. It's really funny walking in the forest one metre higher than you normally are as everything looks slightly different. It's also the easiest time to walk in the forest as you're not trying to get through all the undergrowth. I do love all the different things that happen at various times of the year which I forget about and then they are a wonderful surprise when they come back again. This morning the ravens were flying overhead cawing to each other and I wondered if they were going to be mating soon as I remembered last year taking pictures of them and their fully grown youngsters on the 1st June. That was great as they were over on the rocky face of the Iron Age place over the lake and I got stuck on a ledge after taking a photo. I was so excited that I had forgotten how terrified of heights I am and when I realised where I was I panicked......but I got the dog to drag me back up again. Won't be doing that again this year...well not unless it's a really great shot. According to my book the raven lays its eggs in late winter or early spring, the eggs incubate for 3 weeks then the chicks fly after 45 days. I also realise that I have no idea how a birds sex life works...despite my A level Biology!! How long does the egg take to grow after fertilization?
Wednesday 28th February 2007
Today is Kalevala Day in Finland. The Kalevala is the great Finnish epic which grew out of a rich oral tradition and was assembled by a Finnish scholar Elias Lönnrot and published in 1849. The poetry captures the tales of Väinämöinen, an old seer and the younger Joukahainen who wishes to challenge him. This angers Väinämöinen who chants him deep into a swamp, a meadow and a heath!! To get himself out of trouble Joukahainen offers the old seer his sister Aino as a bride. Väinämöinen thinking he has been offered a house keeper accepts. Aino is quite taken with being his bride but Väinämöinen has other ideas and heads North to woo the maiden of the North. He can marry her if he forges a Sampo, which is a magical machine that churns out salt, flour and money! He can't do that but he knows a man who can, his good friend Ilmarinen the blacksmith. He has to trick Ilmarinen into going North but he makes the Sampo. Then the marriage requires another task and so the maiden remains unmarried.
Meanwhile, another character Lemminkäinen decides to go North and try his luck winning the maiden. He is given tasks in order to win her hand, capturing the elk of Hiisi and the swan from the river of Tuonela. The latter task nearly kills him and he gives up.
Väinämöinen is now making himself a boat to head back up North but he runs out of spells so he has to go and find Vipunen, a giant who knows all the spells. He gets his spells, finishes his boat and heads North but he is seen by the sister of the blacksmith and the blacksmith rides like the wind on his horse and catches up with him. The two men make a pact that they will let the maiden choose between them. The maiden choose Ilmarinen because he forged the Sampo but her mother still wants more tasks done and she orders Ilmarinen to plough the field of vipers. Ilmarinen finds this easy with his armoured boots and cape and so the crone of the North sets him the task of capturing the giant pike of the chill north sea without line or net!!Ilmarinen forges himself a giant eagle and captures the pike. Now the old crone is satisfied and the wedding takes place. Väinämöinen makes a kantele from the jaw of the pike which produces sweet voiced music such that tames the beasts and even causes the sea king Ahti to rise from the depths. He and Ilmarinen use the sweet music to soothe the beasts of the North whilst they take the Sampo for themselves and set sail for home. Louhi, mistress of the North casts a fog spell to stop them, which Väinämöinen conjures away so Louhi unleashes a terrible storm which sweeps the kantele from the boat whereupon Ahti the sea king thinks it is a present to him and he calms the sea. The crone turns herself into an eagle and attacks Väinämöinen's boat and in the struggle the Sampo is broken into pieces. Some of the pieces are washed up on the shore and from the fragments Ilmarinen makes amulets and rings thinking that perhaps there is still some magic left in the pieces. Each resident of Kalevala wears a magic piece on special occasions, wishing for a peaceful life.
Now I've just condensed an epic piece into a few short paragraphs...for which I apologise but it's a great tale and maybe this will encourage folk to read it themselves. There is also so much jewelry available in the Kalevala style and it's very beautiful. This is a link to a collection of brooches to give you some idea of the style although not all are inspired by the Kalevala, the top half of the collection gives you the flavour. I own a bronze cross which many people in the Uk have commented on because it is so unusual.
Wednesday 21st February 2007
Another cold morning but no halos today....she said then looked out her window to see the biggest one ever right in front of her!!! However the sun is really bright so I don't think I can get a good picture of it. I've just tried it and my camera has gone all strange again so no pictures for me today.
When I was out walking this morning I developed white eyelashes from the frost forming on them and then occasionally they would stick together as I blinked and breathed out warm air at the same time. Another strange thing that happens in these temperatures is that you get little icicles forming in your nostrils, if they are uncovered. They form as you breathe in, making a kind of prickly sensation and then they melt as you breathe out. Then walking across the lake my foot went through some deep snow into water underneath, as the snow had insulated the water that had come over the top of the ice. This made my boot wet for a few seconds and then it froze which unfortunately for me meant that I picked up snow under my boot as it attached to the ice and I ended up with platform snow boots! Very trendy! It didn't make any difference to the way I walked in the snow but I had to take them in and melt them in the sink when I got home.
Two years ago a couple of artists came to stay at Mairela for a few weeks to study the Finnish lakes and the beautiful surroundings, in particular to contrast the lakes with UK lakes as an art project. Now the art collection has been completed and I have scanned a Daily Post article from February 2nd telling a little about the artist and the collection
Tuesday 20th February 2007
I knew that it was going to be cold this morning before I got out of bed to look at the thermometer because I could hear all the cracking outside that happens when the temperature plunges below -20 and when I read the meter it was -27. The trees in the forest crack and the telegraph poles crack and of course my house cracks as it's made of wood. When I say crack I only mean the noise like a bullet being fired or a giant whip being cracked, I don't mean that large crevices appear anywhere, as that would not be a very good design for a house in these parts! I had wanted to take my camera out with me this morning but it is still recovering from a strange fit it had yesterday, the screen refused to settle and I kept getting turquoise 'energy' shapes over all my pictures, very pretty but very frustrating! I cleared the card last night and I'm still trying to run the battery down as far as possible hoping that will sort it out. There were some corrupt files on the card so maybe that was the problem. I will tell what happened though as it was weird after me talking about how water is affected by the words we say. I had the camera with me yesterday and as we walked to the taxi the sun came through the forest and highlighted the frost particles in the air so I wanted to get a picture of it but at the precise point that was best there was a telegraph pole and I said very loudly 'Stupid telegraph pole' at which point the pole gave an enormous crack and we both jumped out of our skin! Then I moved up the road to another spot to take a shot but the flash came on and I said very loudly 'stupid camera' and then my camera stopped working properly and all these strange movements started to happen on the screen. Coincidence? Maybe, but I'm going to be politer to everything anyway because it made me think about the energy that I was shooting out into the world and given the choice I know the kind of energy I would rather be putting out there.
So anyway I was out without my camera this morning so of course I saw something very spectacular. There is a phenomena called sundogs or halos (apparently)that happens when the sun is shining in a cold atmosphere. I have seen it many times before by looking at the sun through sun glasses and you can see the circle around it but this morning all I could see was a straight line going up from the ground about 0.5kms away from the sun and then eventually I could see another column on the other side. The columns were mostly red, yellow and green light that I could see and they are beautiful, in fact they are still here now as I type and they are bigger than ever. I have tried to get a photo using my old camera but the lens isn't wide enough to get the sun and the 2 columns in so you'll have to take my word for it how amazing it looks!! I found a webpage that gives a more scientific but good explanation of what is happening here. Now I can see as the two columns are getting taller that they are arcing over the sun so if the rest of it were visible it would be an enormous sun halo. I'm trying to still get some photos...maybe later...
The halo disappeared soon after I wrote about it this morning round about 10.30 but my camera had managed to get one shot of it before running the battery down. The picture is a little dark as would be expected shooting into the sun but you can clearly see the two columns of light either side of the sun.
Friday 16th February 2007
Yesterday was the last day of school for many 18 years olds in Finland and they celebrated in the traditional way by dressing up in various outfits jumping onto the back of a lorry or tractor and parading round the streets throwing sweets at people. I know that in the local school in Kuhmoinen they were even given a purpose build something to dismantle to symbolise the end of their school days. It's a far cry from my old comprehensive in SE London where we were banned from even writing on our shirts or doing anything to celebrate the end of our school days....not that that stopped us but I think it's a wonderful idea to encourage the use of symbolic actions to signify what are huge events in our lives, so well done to the Finns!
Whilst out walking this morning I noticed a telegraph line undulating. It was really noticeable because the frozen white landscape is total still at the moment and tends towards the vertical, so seeing a horizontal line moving really drew my eye. I'd love to know the engineering reasons behind this occurrence. There was nothing moving the wire physically, neither wire adjacent to it was moving and although I stood and watched it for some time the movement never stopped. I don't know if it was caused by the distribution of thick snow on some parts of the wire or what.
My sign with the heart and love written on it made me smile when I saw it and I took a moment to notice the effect within myself...it works I felt good! I took a different route back across the lake to my mum's skiing tracks. She'd complained last week that the water had come over the ice again and when she was trying to ski she ended up with huge ice balls under her skies which made it impossible to move. I can see her sticks are still very badly iced up too. If the snow is very heavy it pushes the ice down and the water in the lake is forced over the top, sometimes it refreezes and sometimes not if it's insulated by a layer of snow. I've spoken before about how disconcerting it is to be walking on the lake and the ice gives way beneath you even though you know that it won't take you straight through to the water underneath and you are perfectly safe. I had the same thought this morning as I could see the hole in the snow where the water had probably come through and I went to investigate it as it looked quite big. Of course it was all frozen again but the noise of the ice cracking under my feet got louder the closer that I got to the hole and eventually I decided that I wasn't going to walk on it regardless of knowing that if it broke I would only go down 8cms at most......my aching back (still recovering from the skiing!) and my nerves objected strongly to being subjected to it!
Thursday 15th February 2007
I was still thinking about all the messages of love that were coming and going yesterday and how lovely it is when the human family connects like that. When I was out walking I drew a heart on the sign for the Iron Age site, in the snow (not vandalism!) and then wrote the word love underneath. It occurred to me that even though I had just written it there in the snow I could feel a special energy that comes from the word or maybe from the intention behind it. My intention for writing it there was to spread some light, maybe that the next person that went past (maybe at the weekend!) would smile when they saw it. I have quite a few painted yellow hearts in various places around Mairela for the same reason. I was inspired by the experiments done with water by Dr Masuru Emoto. If you read his book 'The Hidden Messages in Water' it shows how water physically reacts to our thoughts and words. Words such as love caused the water to produce beautiful crystals and words like 'you fool' caused the crystals to break down. Our bodies are made up of 60% water and certainly in the environment around Mairela there is a lot of water therefore I want to ensure that it is getting loving messages and blessings the whole time. Another interesting thing from the water experiments was that the most beautiful crystals were formed when the water was exposed to the words love and gratitude together and with that in mind I have set my intention to remember to voice my gratitude for the abundance of blessings in my life.
It's not quite the same as Dr Emoto's stuff but I thought that I would like to show a photo that I took a while ago of the frost formation on the top of the lake as it gives the idea of just how beautiful nature can be.
Wednesday 14th February 2007
Today is known as Valentines Day in the UK but here in Finland it is Friends Day. I hadn't realised this the first year that I was here and it came as a bit of a shock to be getting cards and chocolates from my girlfriends because of course in the UK you traditionally send an unsigned card to your secret love. I got many messages from friends today by email and text and therefore I have experienced a day of knowing just how loved I am. It doesn't get any better than that.
Tuesday 13th February 2007
Somebody sent me this link of the Helsinki complaints choir. It takes a while to download if you live in the forest but it's really worth a look for an insight into Finnish life.
Monday 12th February 2007
I've been away on my course again studying Relationship cords and the masochist defence, which I can safely say is the most intense week of my course so far and funnily enough was the mid point of my 3 year course. We had a foot of snow down in Brecon which was really great (especially for those without a very bruised coccyx!) as we could enjoy it without worrying about getting to work and then with the special magic of Energy Healing it all melted just in time for us to drive home on Sunday lunchtime.
The week included some very deep healing for me in particular regard to my trust ( or lack of) towards people in general an increase in the connection to my sexual energy and a strengthening of my connection with my guide. By the end of the week I could look out the window to watch the rain slowly washing away the snow and it felt the same inside of me as the rain of my tears started to wash away and break down the defences that I have kept in place for all these years, little had I realised before that my defences were keeping me in as much pain (and more) than the original wound that caused me to employ them all those years ago in my childhood. The original reason had long since been forgotten and buried and the defence patterns soon settled into habitual life views. It doesn't have to be anything 'big' for us to employ the defences either, we all have them, all different and all distorting the view that we have of the world. I'm choosing to change mine...we all have that choice.
Meanwhile back at home the temperature plunged to -37 on Wednesday morning and hovered around that mark for a few days, so I was very impressed with my little car for starting first time after sitting outside at the airport for a week. I guess that I could give Skoda a plug for making the car! I've never been in temperatures that low as they are quite unusual for the southern parts of Finland, the lowest for me is -32. We still haven't unfroze the hot water pipes in the loo but other than that life continues as normal......and the scenery is just amazing. When I pulled up outside the house the trees heavy with snow had candle lanterns glowing in them and the whole placed looked amazing, the sky was filled with stars, so many stars that it seemed that somebody had painted them there especially for me. Thank you, I really appreciated them.
Monday 5th February 2007
Today is Runeberg's day in Finland. It's a flag day, not a holiday but a day to remember a poet and eat special cakes. I don't need much of an excuse to eat cakes so I like this day! If you would like to know more about Runeberg and the cakes take a look at Finnguide.
Sunday 4th February 2007
A friend sent me this link about Finnish becoming a new world language. I'd like to point out that my friend is Finnish!
Saturday 3rd February 2007
I continued with my falling over theme today whilst out skiing. I've never been very happy on wearing slippery things on my feet whilst out on slippery surfaces since I slipped as a child on ice and really hurt my coccyx, hence skiing and skating are not my favourite sports to participate in. Today I recreated that first incident and crashed down on my coccyx again just moments after going over and smashing my head on a rock. Up until that point I had been doing quite well and was very proud of myself for sliding down the shortest gentlest slope in the whole world. I can't help thinking that all this falling over is a symptom of something greater in the energetic world, the rattling in my poor head when I hit it should definitely have shaken free some blockages, although it's not a method that I'll be using in my healings!
Here is one of my favourite morning photos using two birch trees as a frame and another photo with my daughter demonstrating the depth of the snow....well pretending to anyway!
Wednesday 31st January 2007
I went to Tampere today to pick up someone from the airport and also to drop off some leaflets of my healing practice at some of the health shops there. The roads were very slippery and so I decided that it was best to arrive in one piece and miss the shops rather than risk life and limb for the sake of a few leaflets. I soon was following a huge cloud of snow which turned out to be a low loader lorry. I was wondering how close we had to be before we could see where it was in the snow cloud and at the next village we found out....20 metres!! So I stayed well back from it after that, about half kilometer but eventually this plan went wrong as the lorry stopped to turn right and I didn't see it for ages so I had to brake hard. The car went all over the place but we managed to stop avoiding the ditch, the lorry and the oncoming traffic...then I looked in my rear view and saw the car behind me charging at us and shooting all over the road....at the last moment the car spun round and shot into the ditch. I found a safe place to stop and went to see if the driver was OK and this lady got out smiling and very cheerful......I guess it's just a winter time hazard and she was very happy that her car was perched just at the top of the ditch and hadn't toppled down it and there was a tractor waiting to pull her out. Ironically it was the tractor that had stopped the lorry from turning right in the first place and caused the mayhem but not a scratch on anyone, so all's well....
Then I fell over in Tampere!! I couldn't believe how slippery the exposed pieces of roads were, I've never experienced anything like it before. So me running across a set of traffic lights to get to a shop was a really dumb idea. I went down on my right side so quickly I didn't have time to even think and now I have a purple, green, brown and blue elbow and a bruised imprint of my keys on my thigh.
Monday 29th January 2007
Today was the day that the language course started and I haven't had a letter to say that anyone has dropped out and so I have to face the fact that I probably won't be improving my Finnish much in the next few months but that at least gives me the time to get cracking on my Disease& Pathology course, I opted for the home study course to cut down on the number of flights I'd have to take in the year!!
Talking of flights I was getting a bit concerned that my passport hadn't come back from the British embassy in Helsinki despite me sending it on the 4th Jan and them promising a 10 day turnaround. When I rang them to inquire I was told that they had sent it to me on the 8th...which is quite incredible considering there is a weekend between the two dates. At first I couldn't believe what they were telling me, then it suddenly clicked.....that piece of paper in my post box wasn't the receipt for the registered mail that I'd sent them...it was the notice telling me that I had a registered letter from them!! This is where my language course would come in handy. I thought that it was funny that the extreme efficiency of the embassy had completely caught me off guard like that.....and my new passport has lots of pictures of birds in it too, very pretty.
My dog, Freija, had an accident today and had to have 20 stitches in her back leg, ouch! She completely refused to go to sleep at the vets despite having lots of drugs injected into her so I guess she remembered how painful it was the last time she fell asleep in that place! Good news is that her leg is OK, no deep damage was done and she's now recuperating by the fire. I have to keep the house cold now so that she doesn't dissolve in a pile of sweat!!
And just for good measure here's another photo showing the frozen lake and all the snow with an interesting look to the sky.
Saturday 27th January 2007
It was a gorgeous but cold day today and I got loads of great shots of the birds coming to the birdfeeder just outside my window. I'd like to share some of them. This is the Bluetit posing for the camera it would seem, the Willow tit with the Bluetit behind, the Greenfinch with it's beautiful yellow colour caught nicely in the sunshine, the Redpoll and a nice shot of the Greenfinch and the Redpoll together on the feeder with another Greenfinch just coming in to land in the background, this picture gives a clearer image of the red head that gives the Redpoll it's name. I've started to build an igloo cum birdhide out of snow just by the bird feeders so that I can get some good shots of them over the winter, I'd love to have a video camera to capture the whole scene as it gets like a very busy international airport around here sometimes with all the birds flying around. I'm building the igloo slowly to allow the snow to set properly between times as the snow is so dry and I really don't want the igloo to come down on my head thank you very much.
Thursday 25th January 2007
I took a long route for my walk this morning which took me into some uncleared snow so I have been working my leg muscles really hard wading through snow about 35cms deep! It was during this wading that I got all philosophical again! Something that I get reminded of now and again is that although we are linear creatures (everything has a beginning and an end) the journey through life, whatever take you have on the whys and wherefores of that, isn't about the end result or the obtaining of a goal but we sometimes forget that. This morning I could have stuck my head down and slogged through the snow all the way round my route just with the aim of getting home and feeling great that I had taken the dogs for a walk but I would have missed out on so much if I had. Every step gives me a different viewpoint to admire should I wish to stand and do so for just a second and on many occasions this morning I did. It was -20 this morning but it felt warmer, maybe because I am acclimatised now or maybe because there were a lot of snow clouds about. When I reached the top of the hill the sun was shining on the tree tops and I took this picture of the surrounding tree tops. It's like being a small child again when you have such things towering over you like that! A little further on my walk and the sun had gone as a snow storm was coming, this looked like a thin fog covering everything in the distance and I took this shot of a snowscape as I call them. I think this picture gives an idea of how 'unreal' it can look around Mairela at times especially when everything is covered with snow. Anyway back to my point, yes I did have one! Life isn't about just doing what you have to in order to reach happiness at some future point. Why not take the time now to stop and smell the roses...or look at the big trees and you may just find you have everything you need right here, right now. You never know. What have you got to lose....
Later on in the morning when the sun had come back again I was reminded of another great feature of this kind of weather. As the sun shines across it picks out the tiny pieces of snow/ice dancing in the air and it look as if someone has sprinkled fairy dust in a line between you and the sun.....similar to the way we can see all the dust in our houses (ok maybe just mine!) when the sun shines through the windows but much prettier as dust doesn't reflect light. I managed to capture this on film although it doesn't do it justice when it's not moving and twinkling, so you have to use your imagination to see the real essence of fairydust. Enjoy!
Tuesday 23rd January 2007
It's really strange to be plunged into a world at -19 degrees as it was this morning as I walked with the dogs. There are so many things that you have to consider such as the water under the snow but on top of the ice has stuck to the bottom of my boots as ice because I guess it froze pretty rapidly but I hadn't noticed until I came indoors to grab the wood baskets and went flying along the wooden floors with my new ice (literally!) skates!! For a brief second I couldn't figure out what had happened. The moisture disappears from the snow too at that temperature so the lumps of snow that get left by the snow plough, which I throw off the road before they freeze solid, are like giant meringues that sound like polystyrene when you throw them. As I was walking I heard the loud cracks of the trees moving due to the freezing temperatures, it sounds like someone treading on a enormous twig.
Monday 22nd January 2007
Last week the snow finally came but we still experienced some days where it snowed then rained then snowed again, then finally the temperature dropped below zero. This strange sequence of events has meant that the snow was literally plastered to the trees and everywhere and then has been frozen on so everywhere I look it's white. I drove down to Helsinki on Saturday to do some healing work and I noticed that the snow is very localised to where I live so I feel very privileged. Apparently it was -18 overnight on Saturday and this morning it was -18 again so I knew that I could definitely walk across the lake safely. This means that I can make a new route with walking the dogs and instead of trudging through all the deep snow in the forest I can carry on down the road and then come home across the lake. I tried it this morning and the first thing I noticed was the brown stain in the middle of the lake, the fact that it's brown means that it's lake water because the lake has a peat bottom. Sometimes the water comes up over the ice but I don't really know the mechanics of it just that it happens sometimes. I knew that there was less snow on the lake than on the ground which would mean that some of it had melted and therefore there would be two layers of ice on the lake...and I was right. This is important to know because when you are trudging over the ice especially for the first time and your foot suddenly goes through and you get wet feet it can be very scary even though you are still stood there. Even armed with the knowledge that the lake is safe it took a lot of trust to walk right over with my feet occasionally going through the top layer. I could see the fox tracks going across the lake too and it seems from the small piece of white fur by my pier that he enjoyed his dinner there too!
Saturday 13th January 2007
I'm very excited because this morning I saw my first Coal Tit (Parus ater) on my feeder. They were one of my favourite birds as a child, maybe because they are so small and sweet. They are barely bigger than a Goldcrest and have a white stripe on the back of their black head. There has been a light sprinkling of snow during the night so everything is white again but the snow clouds are still here, consequently it's warmer (-2) but not sunny.
Friday 12th January 2007
It's a beautiful clear and cold day, still no snow but at least the temperature is about right for this time of year. As we walked up to get the early taxi just before 8am the stars were bright and the waning moon looked gorgeous, the temperature was about minus 8. I took the long walk again today, right around the lake and a slight detour up onto the Linnavuori to catch the sun coming up. To my left I had the red sky just above the tree line, ahead were the grey and yellow clouds of sunrise, slightly to the right were the striated clouds in layers of yellow and grey and then to my right was the beautiful moon. It was so beautiful that it made me sing softly to myself, after a while the lake joined in with it's belching noises and then the raven started cawing and finally another bird started to make noises too (probably telling me to be quiet!). I wish Iwas smart enough to know exactly which bird it was but I'm not....either a small owl or maybe the black woodpecker, although I'm not sure if they winter round here.
Back home now and the sun is shining very brightly producing a wonderful effect on the frosty ground which I believe is called refraction and is almost impossible to catch on camera....I've just tried for ages! It's the glistening of colours blue, golden yellow, red and maybe green and it's just amazing, as if someone has been out and sprinkled huge pieces of very bright glitter all over the ground. Also on the ground are a small flock of Redpolls. I got out my birdbook to look up the exact species as the Redpoll is one of those breeds that has so many variants...and I'm still not sure but I think they are Mealy Redpolls (Carduelis flammea) as opposed to Hoary Redpolls (Carduelis exilipes). To be honest the difference for most of us is irrelevant, they are pretty looking birds and it's interesting to be able to pick out the new males as they have a pink chest in their first winter. I've also just heard the normal cry of the black woodpecker (Dryocopus martius) outside so it probably was him this morning up on the Linnavuori.
Thursday 11th January 2007
I've got my letter back about the language course, unfortunately I couldn't understand what it said, not having been on the course yet. I took it with me to tai chi last night to ask what the general gist of it was and apparently I have been accepted but they don't have enough room on the course for everyone so I'm 2nd reserve. Now all I need to do is to find out who else is on the course and try to persuade them to drop out or I could just trust in the universe that it will happen if it's the right thing for me to be doing right now.
Language skills would help with all the forms I get from school. Today is another great example, 15 minutes before going out the door my darling daughter produces a double sided medical form in Finnish and informs that she needs it done today. This time I put my foot down and said no.
Having had a look at it now I can see that saying no was irrelevant as this form will takes me hours to do anyway. And then there was the reference to the vaccination that she will be getting from the doctor in the spring.......no consent form or anything just an announcement!! I started to think about how difficult it would be to refuse permission or to stop her from getting the jab. Then it all started to look really complicated and I could feel myself getting depressed about the whole thing. Then as synchronicity would have it I read an article about vaccinations in my natural matters newsletter about vaccinations and homeopathy and it has fired me up. There is no way that I will allow my apathy (and fear of looking stupid as I can't speak the language) to get in the way of my daughters health. From everything that I have even seen, read or heard there is too much produced in fear in this world and vaccinations are a classic example of it. I'm sure that originally scientists had right intentions with what they were doing or trying to do but we are smarter than that now. The human body is an amazing act of creation and can bring itself back to balance if we would just give it the chance. Rather than living out of kilter for most of our lives and then trying to fix it with a course of this or a yoga class once a week we are better served by living in the right way in the first place. I will not have my daughter injected with unnatural substances on the off chance that she will get diphtheria, tetanus or pertussis (whooping cough) and not be able to deal with it because the only reason that her body wouldn't be able to deal with it would be because she has been subjected to all of these poisons that they call vaccinations and her health had been compromised.
I don't want to join in with the whole fear based way of looking at life so I like to focus on the fact that I keep healthy by wearing, using and eating pure natural substances that enhance my natural well-being rather than compromising it. Sometimes I don't succeed with doing that and sometimes I get it wrong but I don't let that stop me from keeping it as my focus. The best way to get over illness is to not get ill in the first place but if you do get sick then let your body deal with it in the way it knows best.....your part in this is to stop piling on the workload. If you get a runny nose or a runny anything for that matter don't try and stop it because that is one of your body's ways of eliminating toxic substances.
Monday 8th January 2007
The long range weather forecast from the beginning of last December stated that we wouldn't get any real snow (as in the big stuff!) until the middle of January. At the time I hoped that they would be wrong but now with only another week to go before mid January I am really hoping that they are very right! On Saturday morning a flock of greenfinches turned up for breakfast. Now I don't know if they are coming back for spring time or just leaving because the real winter is about to start, I'm hoping, of course, that it's the latter. This morning however, it's raining again, all the snow has disappeared again and it's so dark!! It's 9.15am just now and none of the birds have come for breakfast yet so I guess that they are having a lie in this morning. Good for them!
Friday 5th January 2007
This morning I headed off to do the same walk as yesterday and catch the sunrise but the weather has turned warm and rainy again (this is very weird for Finland in January, there shouldn't be green grass in these parts at this time of year but you can see it everywhere!). I was feeling peeved about the weather when I noticed that the ice had a layer of water on it and the breeze was blowing this water around....I love it when that happens because you can follow the breeze and the water all the way around the lake, it's as if a giant invisible hand is swirling the water round and making beautiful patterns on the ice. Huge patches of white form and disappear before your eyes in some magical way that reminds me of the way that the Northern lights swirl around in the sky. I feel as if I could sit and watch it forever, no two patterns are ever the same and everything is constantly moving....a bit like life where each moment is totally unique and will never happen again.
I've sent off an application to join a Finnish language course being run by the job centre in the bigger town 20 miles up the road and I should hear back in the next 10 days if I am successful. They may not accept me because I'm not unemployed and I have other commitments to my time with my energy healing studies and my healing work, however, nothing ventured etc. If I do get onto the course it will be a huge commitment for the next 5 months as it's full time Monday to friday....I've already started mourning all the long walks in the snow that I will miss having with my dogs but I'm focusing on the fact that I really do want to learn to speak Finnish well enough to communicate with everyone I meet and if 5 months of intensive training doesn't do it then I have no idea what will!!
Next week will be the first meditation group meeting that a friend and I have put together. When I say put together I mean that in the loosest sense because we are just making it up as we go along as that is the way that we want it to be, organic and flexible so that it can mould itself to be the what will serve the community best. I'm hoping that people will feel more at ease about not really knowing about anything and yet not worrying about it when they see and hear just how inadequate my Finnish language skills are and yet I am not going to let that stop me from trying my best. I find that a lot when I ask people if they speak English and they say no, then when they hear how bad my Finnish is and yet I still use it they feel safer to use their English, which is always more advanced than my Finnish, it's just a matter of having confidence and not worrying about getting everything perfect the first time or even the second time. Focus on what is important, in the latter case it's being able to communicate (talking to other people) and in the former it's about being able to find your way to connect with yourself at whatever level is right for you right here, right now (meditation).
Thursday 4th January 2007
Life is slowly returning to normal after the Christmas excesses, my daughter is back at school so I'm up early and walking the dogs which should help to start shifting some of the weight that I've put on these past few weeks. I feel as if I've eaten half the world supply of chocolate...and I look like it too!
So I headed off for a nice long walk this morning in the dark as the moon seemed to have disappeared. Last night was fantastic as we'd had a sprinkling of snow (still waiting for the proper stuff) and the full moon reflected off it beautifully. There were gorgeous purple, blue and pink stripes across the sky as the sun started to come up and so when I reached round to the other side of the lake I took a detour up on the Linnävuori (Iron age fortress place) and sat watching the sky change as a kind of meditation. The view from there looks out across a lake with an island with forest going for as far as the eye can see and then the by now, red and pink sky blazing behind it. The lake below was making the noises that lakes make when they are first freezing and the air is still being forced out from below, it's an amazing sound which I can't even begin to spell but it's a bit like a giant burping gently under the ice (sorry that's the best I can do to describe it!) and then the granite surroundings of the lakes echo it a little more and it's just great to listen to. So there I was sat in my idyllic position watching and listening to beautiful nature all around me...and then there was my dog Freija who wanted to play fetch. She grabbed a pine cone as usual and when I ignored her she threw it at me (yes she really does and she's getting to be a good shot too!) with her mouth until eventually I told her to go away but undeterred she came back with a stick (convinced that I just wasn't impressed with the pine cone) and did the same thing, then when that failed to make me join in the game she got a larger stick and threw that at me. So there I was meditating blissfully with an array of pine cones and sticks on top of me...and I wouldn't have missed it for the world. It's 7 years on from the day I found out I had ovarian cancer, without it I probably wouldn't be sitting with my back resting on a pine tree looking out over such amazing beauty therefore it truly was a gift. Just for the record I'd like to say that nobody needs to go down the big illness route in order to find true bliss, the Buddha sat under a tree and contemplated for ages to find his, so just choose your method and go get it...because you're worth it!! I wonder if I'll get sued by some shampoo company now.....
Monday 1st January 2007
Happy New Year! I went out celebrating last night to friends, which is quite unusual for me. It was great, we ate too much, set off a couple of rockets and played lots of games. We also looked into our futures for the coming year in the old traditional Finnish way by melting some tin on the stove and then throwing it (carefully) into a bucket of cold water then examining the shape that it had formed as this foretells your future. If you hold it up against some candle light then the shadow it throws on the wall makes the shape of what will come into your life. Everyone else had good shapes but I couldn't really work out what mine was telling me.....my friend suggested it was the man that would come into my life, well it'll sure be easy to recognise him because he's kind of long and gnarled looking!!
My message to myself and thus the world for this year will be one of transformation as opposed to the old ways of annihilation. To transform the dark to light rather than trying to destroy it. I don't know how many people are at war with each other right now but I do know that out of the world population of 6.5 billion they are in the minority and transformation will come by showing that there is a better way to live, there is another way to live, there are many ways to live side by side with our family...the human race.